Hi Pineapple,

Glad to see we're getting back to the serious business of moaning around here! I feel a bit like this most of the time, I do feel I could/can be as good as other people, and hold my own though. I just get really stressed that I'm not performing at my potential and maybe I'll never crack it and get to my peak, thereby properly holding my own. I'm feeling the pressure of that at the moment, particularly, because I've recently swapped to a top department and all the students seem to have it sorted, and are so outwardly confident. I'm sure they're all grammar/private school the first class degree types - which having more or less dropped out of school at 14 and failed everything; then having taken my GCSEs and Alevels over 3 years at a community college in my 20s - I am not! I'm genning up on grammar, punctuation and writing style because I know that's an area of my education which has been seriously lacking, maybe when I get that licked I'll feel better.

It's so good to have this forum and know that other PhD students have these feelings too - I'd feel prertty isolated without that. So, thank you, Pineapple.

I know I should be doing this PhD and having a wonderful career - so, Pineapple, if I, who failed everything at school should be here, then I'm sure your lack of a first class degree means nothing. Loads of people I knew at uni who got firsts were no brighter than people who got 2:1s, in fact many of them were not as bright as some 2:1ers or 2:2ers, they just knew how to present and were having a better time of things (no offence to all you firsts out there).

I love having something in my life which is so close to my heart, and my self, that a care passionately enough to need to moan, moan, moan about things which threaten it. I also LOVE the camaraderie of this form, and to know that we are all going through this, and can share our experience anonymously when we need to.

AAAAAAHHHHHH! I LOVE the smell of thesis in the morning.


Seriously, I love the sense of achieving something really difficult, I love learning to write, being creative, being the master (largely) of my own work. Now I'm going to stop because I feel as though I'm at a job interview.

Tommy, we were having a bit of light hearted banter - nothing was meant as viscious - I also teased Bug and she thought it was funny, sorry you took it so seriously and were offended.

Your original post said nothing about the positive aspects of PhD life, or about your regret about what you seem to see as alot of unecessary moaning: it took a condescending tone about those people who had experienced relationship difficulties which were exasperated by their PhD commitments.

It must be wonderful to have glided through this process with ease, however, do spare a thought for those people for whom completing a PhD is rather like climbing Mount Everest: wonderful, exhilerating, the experience and achievement of a life time and beautiful but also hazardous (financially and in terms of relationships) and exhausting.

So if you want to announce some of your joyful PhD experiences I'm sure we'd all like to hear about it, but please don't take the tack of putting down those who need to vent and find mutual support in order to get through this process. Many people who use this forum find it an invaluable way of getting through, they're not just moaning for the sake of it.

Hi Sarah, I've just been reading about uses of the word 'whom' in Joseph William's book 'Ten Lessons in Clarity and Grace'.

Williams reckons that whom should be used as 'the object of a verb proposition'.

E.g. 'Who am I writing for?' (incorrect) 'For whom am I writing' (correct)

Using 'whom' as the subject is also incorrect.

E.g. 'The committee must decide whom should be promoted' (incorrect)

Williams reckons misuse of whom, as the subject of a sentence, can be a sign of over enthusiasm for grammatical rules, born of insecurity.

However, I would go with whatever the examiner says, especially since when I just ran the correct and incorrect uses of 'whom' through my Word 2007 grammar check it passed them all; I find Word grammar check is not always reliable. 

Yeah, Leopardi's post could be taken two ways, I mean, firstly, that he has a problem with relationships which are anything other than sexual, so he wants help getting some more sexual ones. Or secondly, the cry for 'help!' it could mean that he wants people to help him commit to relationships with emotional depth.

I advise Leopardi to go with the flow and not worry about it too much; people tell me that the right person will wait until the PhD is over.

Bug I hope you're not rolling on the floor with someone out there in cyberland: not Leopardi is it?

Yes, I  know, I'm being a bit naughty! I've got 'surely I should be on holiday: everyone else is' jet lag, which is putting me in a mischievous mood, so I couldn't resists letting it all fall out of my head, and onto the thread (or writing in spontaneous alliteration). Yes, I too feel that she who bestows routine gratitude and appreciation to Tommy is probably not a doll: or any other man made item.

I meant to say ardourous, not arduous, in my previous post; so sorry for any confusion.


Personally, I find the idea of emotional commitment to a one on one relationship a big, intrusive prospect at the moment. I don't want anything in my life that could possibly drain my PhD project, although it would be wonderful if something came along which didn't.

Rosy, I agree!

Also! At 1:30 in the morning, surely someone with the kind of prowess claimed by this arduous poster would be at it, or at least sleeping off a session, at time in the morning, not trawling through archive threads on PhD forums.

And! The idea that his girlfriend 'routinely' tells him how romantic he is comes across as questionable, I mean who 'routinely' does something like that: a wind up doll?

Also! The poor grammar made me doubt the verisimilitude of this potent posters words, surely no PhD student, who was in no great distress, would be so slack (unless of course there was some other, more empirical distraction at hand - please excuse the pun).

I also found out the hard way (although it hasn't caused me too much pain) that sharing too much of your research is risky. I sent an early outline of my thesis to an academic who seemed to be very impressed and appreciative, and, lo and behold, the following year a PhD student of his starts researching an aspect of the abstract - something I had chosen not to follow up. Your research etc is your product and you want to make sure you get the credit, before it starts turning up in pother people's books/papers/lectures.

I mean couldn't you speak to this person about methods etc anyway - is it really necessary to send them your work to get that kind help?

Having looked up the words complex and complicated in my Oxford English Dictionary I found the following:

complex: 1. Consisting of many different and connected parts. 2. not easy to understand: complicated or intricate.

complicated: 1. Consisting of many different parts or elements; intricate. >involving many different and confusing aspects. 2. Medicine involving complications.

So the difference is that complex indicates a connectedness between the complication of many different parts.

Niether 'complex' nor 'complicated' describe a process; although complexification and complication do.

So the literary critic must have been indicating some connection between the complicated parts to which he/she was discussing - using the word complication would have neglected that dimension.

Complexification is a new word which found its way out of mathematics, and into broader academic use, according to the quick internet search I've just made.

This thread made me laugh out loud! Only a bunch of PhD students would have this discussion on a Sunday in July - now I'll get back to reading Eats, Shoots and Leaves - so glad I'm not alone in my interest in precision (although some, philistines, might call it pedantry!!!).

Although I'm not a postdoc, I second the advice to 'go for what you really want': when looking to change supervisor, I contacted loads of academics, and only got one 'yes' - that was from the one who I thought was way out of my league, but who was my dream supervisor. I'd written to him with a what the hell attitude!

It stands to reason that if your work is right up their street, they'll be more likely to be interested in you.

Calling all PhD students living in the Northwest of England who feel the need for some camaraderie and extra support

The idea is to meet now and again at a coffee shop or similar: let me know if you are interested and we can start making arrangements.

OK Smoobles, I'll set up a Northwest PhD support group thread and see what happens.

I think support groups are a great idea, especially for part-timers: it's easy to feel disconnected from PhD life. I've never encountered a PhD student support group. I'm a part-time student and live 2 hours away from my department so I feel te lack of this particularly strongly.

I think it'd be a good idea to start something, even if it's just meeting in a coffee shop every now and again. What to people think? I live in the Northwest.

Pamplemousse that sounds appalling.

I teach at an art school (not where I study for my PhD) and they pay me approx 34.00 per contact hour for seminars and lectures. For lectures we're given two or three hours, and it's up to the individual lecturer if they want to make the actual lecture that long or not - or you can show visual material.

Also we get extra hours here and there, for things which need no preparation, like tutorials, field trips, i.e. gallery visits which take about 3 hours, and department meetings, which we are paid for at the teaching hourly rate.

We have to mark and carry out admin outside of this.

According to a union rep I know each contact hour carries 2 1/2 hours of work, and that includes the time you spend with the students. So what most of us are being paid contravenes that, but your uni absolutely takes the biscuit!!! I'd say the situation you describe is very unethical indeed. Just depends how much you need the experience!