We've probably all been at a stage where you've got stacks of work, life in general isn't going the way you'd like it to, you have no idea what the future holds and you feel isolated and without any mates. In fact, you look at those around you and you feel as though they have it so much better, having lots of fun and the freedom to do whatever they like. Well, I hope it's not just me at least! I'm at that stage now. I feel like jackin' everything in and running for the hills. My main sup has dropped out of my PhD, I miss my past - and I've just been told I have to develop powers of reflexivity for my research - grrrr, arrgghhh! I'm actually feeling a bit sorry for myself and unmotivated - and that's just not healthy! So, would it be possible to ask anyone interested and willing what they do when they have the mindset (or similar) that I have just described above. How do you stop yourself from indulging in self-pity and remain positive. I've tried to remind myself that I only have another year to go soon, but then I recall that it is the only funded year that I have left and that I have an awful lot to do. Any advice, in any form, whether constructive words or a sharp, verbal slap, would be appreciated. :-(

When I feel that low I usually talk to my husband about it, and then take a bit of a break. Don't force yourself to do PhD work when you're in the mindset, do something else, anything else other than that. And that usually means that I feel better the next day and am all ready to go again.

I've had phenomenal PhD lows over the last 2 years (I'm part-time, so the time-scale is roughly equivalent to second year mid PhD doldrums), but have somehow got through them, and I'm nearly finished now.

Also don't make any decisions in haste. If you're upset with the PhD take a break. Even a day doing something else can make all the difference. Don't keep slogging on if you're miserable. But that doesn't mean walking away.

yesterday I was at one of our regular Saturday meetings that have been arranged for us - I requested these especially for us part-timers, as we miss out on lots of things which run in the day - all PhDers are welcome too of course and we regard it as a time to meet up - anyway one of the people who came along to give one of the sessions has just finished her PhD, and she said that her house had been spotless whilst she had been doing it, and at first she thought of this urge to clean as procrastination, but now realised it was thinking time and therefore very valuable. So my advice to you is to treat whatever you do as this 'thinking time' and go and enjoy a break, don't think 'I should be doing so-and-so', you shouldn't, your brain will be humming away in the background - not too loud I hope - it may scare others    :-) and it will be ready to reveal all when you decide to get back to work!

Thanks very much for the advice, Mrs BilboBaggins. You're right in that, even when I'm not working, I'm always thinking about my work. So, even if I take a break, it's still constructive in a manner of speaking. Not to sound self-indulgent and mard, but I think it's an existential uneasiness I'm experiencing, mixed in with the old PhD blues. To be more specific, I'm stuck at home with my family after having freedom and a life and just working on my PhD day after day, not seeing anyone, socialising or anything - and it's made me realise what a sociable person I actually am. So I just spend hours thinking 'Christ' - not to take his name in vain - 'is it always going to be like this? '. Being a researcher can be a very solitary and ascetic occupation, if you want to be very successful as a general rule - and I really don't want a life that turns out like that. No disrespect to existing researchers, as I am in no way making comparisons, but I just keep thinking to myself 'I want to be normal' and 'I am normal'.
I should just stop moaning and get on with it, just get my head down for one more year, but you're right, I should take a break and try and get involved in something else. I'm actuality looking at getting involved with some volunteer work, just something fun in the real world to escape all the abstract crap I'm having to work through at the moment.

Thank you for the advice Joyce, I do find myself going off to do different things in the daytime at the moment. I go off and do some gardening and I find that helps - I still think about my work as I'm doing it. It's just sometimes, I find I can make myself really guilty, thinking that I should be working harder when I can't because I'm exhausted and rather fed up with it. I need to remind myself that I have just one more year (funded) and that it'll be worthwhile in the end. As I've just posted, I'm also trying to think about bringing other responsibilities into my life, aside from the PhD - such as volunteer work or even the gym. I think being sat at a computer all day long can make your mind fester. :-)

It's so easy to lose perspective with a PhD. As everyone has said, the only way to not drive yourself crazy is to spend some time away from it. You need it for your own sanity but it really does help you to get past those moments when you find yourself stuck in a mental rut. Many times I've come to a complete halt and just walked away from it in disgust but when I came back to it, I found that I've got past whatever the problem was. I find that watching films helps because they don't take long to watch and therefore I don't feel guilty that I'm wasting too much time. Plus when you're watching a film , you're not thinking about the PhD (provided the film is not a complete dud).

We've all been there with the self-pity and the "why am I putting myself through this hell?" days. I still do ;-) But I've been lucky enough to be involved in collaborative research outside of my PhD area and it's much more fun when you're working with people. So grit your teeth and you'll get through it and it will be much better when you finish. When you're feeling really fed up come here and have a good moan :-)

I'm only starting my MSc this September so really don't know how much help I can realistically give, but I can say that, for me, the best way of having a break from your work is exercise, like the gym or swimming, something outside. When I was working flat out for my undergraduate degree (probably nothing compared to what you're doing, but I was giving it my all) I still allowed myself to ride my horse everyday as he needed the exercise and it was a total break that I didn't feel guilty for having, I would have felt more guilty if I hadn't done it and it doesn't take much time out of my day as I get up early to do it. What I'm trying to say is that it can really help to have some other small responsibilities aside from your PhD; although it is obviously the priority and should be, you have to look after yourself as well and don't feel guilty for taking some time out to go to the gym or whatever. I personally wouldn't advise watching tv/a film as a break as you're still looking at a screen and mentally processing something, its best to go outside and use your mind in a totally different way so that you feel more refreshed and motivated afterwards.

I feel like I've lost a few friends at this stage even as I do tend to isolate myself and just get on with the work, and its also unfortunate that none of my friends from university are pursuing postgraduate studies, so they don't necessarily understand why I want to do it, and what I want for my career, at the end of the degree they just wanted to get pissed and stop studying asap. I'm not saying that I'm not sociable, however for me, work will always come first and some of my friends seem to resent that. Anyway, enough about me...I'm just saying that isolation is maybe an inevitable part of research if you want to do well, it is really hard though and I can understand what you are experiencing there to an extent.

I also want to say, as someone at the very beginning of the process who only has ambitions of doing a PhD, you are really fortunate to be in the position you are in. I'm not implying that you are taking it for granted, however maybe try to think back to when you had graduated, and when you decided you were going to do a PhD...how did you feel then? Excited and motivated about your research? Try to think that it is a wonderful achievement to be accepted to do a PhD, and to get funding or whatever, look back at the good moments of your academic life so far and the good things that have been said about your work. I don't want to sound patronising at all, I totally acknowledge that it is a tough situation but, for me, it appears to be part of the complex PhD process that I would love to experience in the future.

I hope thats made some sense and that you feel better soon, Natassia x x

That's all very well, but it's not enough to sustain enthusiasm through the long slog that is a PhD. It's totally different in difficulty from an undergraduate degree, and far more prolonged than a Masters. Most PhD students go through mid PhD doldrums, and it's nothing like anything they've experienced before in their academic life. It can take an awful lot of determination to keep going.

Looking at the positives is a good tip, but can only do so much. But keeping going, despite everything, is the key.

I totally understand that and as I said before I am at the very beginning of the process and so have a limited idea of what PhD study is actually like; I don't need to be reminded of that. I was just trying to say something constructive and you aren't the person to judge whether it is constructive or not, in my opinion.