Not sure that this is a PhD related topic entirely, or even at all, but it IS eduction related. I just finished reading another book on the desegregation of United States schools, and its so eye opening ( in a very distressing way) to read the accounts of what people went through to simply get access to decent education. I am not reading this for my PhD, and I AM American. I had thought desegregation was a fait accomplait by the 1970's but it WAS NOT!!!! Some 20 years after the original Supreme Court decision, there were still places where integrated education had not taken hold!

I was not hiding under a bush during these times--my parents stressed the importance of me attending an integrated school rather than participating in the white flight to the outer edges of town to other schools ( I am white, I should perhaps clarify), we talked about integration and racial prejudice, about equality and rights, etc, in my family. As a child you lack perspective, you do not really know how to put into any historical context or timeframe what is happening around you. You do not see the bigger picture, you just live.

You think that 5 years ago was irrelevant, and 20 years ago beyond imagining, something like the Roman times. But now that I can reflect more about this time of American history and experience, it was not that long ago, and the issues that had been going on and on were still not resolved when I was in school, and many of my African American school mates may have had siblings or themselves struggled through the horrific experiences described in some of these books.

You think that 5 years ago was irrelevant, and 20 years ago beyond imagining, something like the Roman times. But now that I can reflect more about this time of American history and experience, it was not that long ago, and the issues that had been going on and on were still not resolved when I was in school, and many of my African American school mates may have had siblings or themselves struggled through the horrific experiences described in some of these books.

Which--all makes me think about how ACCESS to educational opportunity is so key to which people can do HE and which cannot, and that access can be denied in the most unfair ways. The Little Rock, Arkansas school district closed down for a year rather than comply with the requirements to integrate. http://www.watson.org/~lisa/blackhistory/school-integration/lilrock/shutdown.html

I mean, imagine, CLOSING DOWN the entire public ( that would be state-run in British English) school system rather than integrate the schools---??!

No doubt many people who would have and could have pursued even high school education, not to mention university and post graduate work NEVER EVER got the glimmer of a chance because of the color of their skin.

And then, states and schools went to long lengths to not actually integrate...I know of someone who was African American in a southern US state where the state, rather than have him attend the state university, paid to send him OUT of state to another university. He became an internationally known professor in his field. HE got access...and was a brillant person...but how many other people equally potentially brilliant could not get the access because of the barriers put in place, all on skin color?

Knowing all this makes me realize and reminds me that I should not take my own access to education for granted--I should value it, and prize it, and know it does not make me "better" than anyone, for indeed it does not, and it reminds me that out in the world are no doubt lots of people with the same passion for learning and research that simply cannot get access...because of the circumstance of life in a developing country, or a war torn country, or whathaveyou.

It makes me sad and ill to think of the amount of unfairness in the world. And the deliberate cruelty with which the unfairness can be handed out to individuals. I cannot save the world, I cannot solve that level of problem, all I can try to do is be cognizant in my own small corner of the world of these things, appreciate what I have, and do what ever I can, even no matter how small, to try and make this a better space and place.

olivia, i think i feel very similarly to you.

some of you might remember me going on and on about not being funded and all. well, the experience, while not fun, did teach me some things. on the one hand, i learned that being good at what you do does not earn you the right to get funding for higher education. in theory it might be that the brightest, most promising students get the funding - in practice, there are many other things that factor into the decisions. be it the colour of your skin, or the colour of your passport. the world is not open to you if it's the wrong colour.
on the other hand, well, i really wanted to do this PhD and i started out, even though i didn't get funding. only because i am in a very priviledged situation to start with, did i have this possibility.

yes, i spent all my savings - if i had grown up in a different country, all my savings plus all my friends' and family's savings wouldn't have been enough. and they wouldn't have gotten a visa, either. for me the question was tough - i had to sacrifice a lot. but my choice was: if you really want it, you can make it happen. other people do not have this choice - no matter how much you want it, you can't make it happen. so yes, it has taught me humility, and to be grateful for what i have.

sometimes i get angry when people who have much more than i do, are not humble, but rather complain about how badly life is treating them. but then, i try to be patient. i remember that i, too, used to think that i deserve being funded. it took a learning process. also, one unfairness does not make the other unfairness less. so why not complain when you are treated unfairly. just do keep the humility of realising how priviledged you are on other counts. that's what i ask for of myself and am always happy to see in others.

Well, I consider myself as "lucky", because my parents had and still are helping me with my studies.
In my country, it is almost imposible to enter a university without extra help (I mean lessons apart from school), which means a lot of money,as it's almost 45 euros per hour. My parents could provide that for me and I managed to get into a university.
There comes the second financial difficulty, which is studies!!! We don't have to pay tuition fees, but almost always we have to change cities, we have to rent houses (as there aren't enough halls), pay the bills etc. Which means that someone without the help of parents' cannot study. Simple as that!

Later, I decided to do a masters. But, I couldn't do it in my own country, as I had to know the right people in the right positions to be accepted at the course I wanted. And even if I were accepted (after passing very difficult exams and an interview) the lectures were starting in November and the course lasted for 2 years (if I were lucky, as it is normal for lecturers here not to appear for semesters at the university). So, I had to have one more lost year. And one more year of family support.
So, I chose a UK uni. I spent a lot of my parents money although I tried to save as much as possible. If they weren't able to help me.... I would have never had the opportunity for a masters.
The same thing is happening now. I am a PhD student in the UK and I have the financial support of my parents as the money from my full-time teaching job in my country are almost enough to cover my personal expenses.

I believe that it is very unfair for those who do not have the money but have the ability and will to study, to go further..
It has made me realise that I am very lucky. That I must be grateful for what I have. That I must "keep the humility of realising how priviledged" I am (as shani puts it).

My subject is education, and i can tell you that all is not rosy here either. i started this as a result of realising that the government has their fingers well and truly in the education pie and are extracting everything they can. what started as a fairly mild anger at the ssytem is turning into a full scale rant. The trouble is it is having to be worded very carefully - to get it past the powers that be. This is causing a few hitches along the way, but I will get there and reveal all. Hope someone other than those already part of the struggle will get the message.

try reading 'deschooling society' by Illich, it is quite thought provoking and you can download it from the internet