I'm a PhD parent - and before that, an MA parent. When I started the MA, I was part-time and self-funded, and my son hadn't yet started school. Now I'm currently a full-time and funded PhD student, and my son's old enough to walk to school by himself. So things have changed over the years. My experience is that every stage has different challenges, or opportunities.

One thing I've learned, especially going full-time, is to be very clear about what I need to work effectively. 'I need to get this finished by Monday' means, 'I need to get this finished by Monday.' It does not mean, 'I need to get this finished by Monday, so please could you take him out for the day on Saturday? Then I'll have some study time to do this.' My husband is very supportive - he's great - but he's not a mind-reader (anymore than I am).

Another thing I've noticed is how my PhD time is affected by external circumstances. An apparently achievable study plan can be thrown off-kilter by the unexpected, and I think that if you have domestic responsiblities, there often isn't the slack to deal with this, without it impacting adversely on the PhD. This isn't necessarily a long-term problem, if it's just that your child has a minor tummy-bug, and all you have to do is re-arrange a supervision session. But more serious problems - not only domestic problems, but research issues, or other PhD matters - can be a real concern. I had to take a break at one point just to catch-up, which wasn't ideal.