hi chickpea n Eska
thanks for your replies. actually I have always been like that (hyper-kind), it has only been the last two years that I acquired needy friends. It's probably me (being too nice), and now that I think about it, it's probably also the area that I live, because when I lived in "happier" places, none of my friends were needy.

I have only moved to this area in the past two years -- and all of my "close" friends are needy!

I feel a lot better today, thank you so much. Here are my new solutions:

Friend A = sends me emails like " I love to listen to your voice. I could sit and listen all day to you. Sorry if I became emotional, I never want to say goodbye, it hurts."

solution = only reply ONE email and only when I feel like it, there is no obligation to reply to every single email

Friend B = just don't pick up the phone, only pick up when I feel like it, most of the time, don't pick up

Friend C = stay away, but still keep my word to her, as she has told me - if I don't see her/bump into her/hear from her in days, either contact the police or her solicitor.

love satchi

I am overwhelmed by three needy friends - I don't know why at this point of my life I am attracting needy people.

Friend A = is elderly and have only learned how to use skype (and it's my fault because I taught him - now he wants to skype every week), he emails me twice a day, gets extremely anxious when I don't reply

Friend B = likes to moan over the phone (I have managed to get away by not answering the phone)

Friend C = likes to moan over coffee (and 3 out of 5 times she invites me, she will cancel at the last minute)

How do I get away from Friend A? how can I tell him the truth -- "you are needy, clingy, and our friendship is wearing me down"

Now I dread looking at my emails, and I am angry with myself for letting him into my life!!! I am angry with myself for being so stupid when I first befriended Friend A. I should have not given him my email address. I have really learnt a big lesson :-(

How do I stop feeling so angry at myself???? every morning I get back feeling so angry and so anxious, for example TODAY at 12 o'clock, Friend A is going to skype me! I have already avoided three times of skype, I don't know how I can do it today again. I have been a fool with friends.

love satchi

Hi everyone
I have been quite distressed about this --
I submitted a paper seven months ago to a journal --and only today I have heard from the editor (and that is because I emailed them to ask-- my emails have always been really polite) -- that they are still waiting for reviewer's comments. Is seven months too long? What if I change my mind and want to submit elsewhere, how can I retract my submission then? Or should I just sit and wait? what should I do? I just feel like I can't move forward, I know we are supposed to do other things and write other papers, but I still can't get past this long long long wait.

Thanks
love satchi

hi Athena30, well done on getting invited to interview! another tip to add:
go back to the job specs and person spec requirements, and practice answering questions based on those.

For example:
Experience working with children - essential
Experience working in a clinical setting - essential

practice talking on these part OR write out an answer

best of luck
love satchi

hi balea welcome to the Forum.
A phd can be done at any time - I think survival is more important - are you thinking of doing a full-time phd? how will you fund yourself? can you survive during the minimum 3 years, for most people, the phd process can extend another year or more.

Do you have a family to support etc. for example, you will have to start looking for something else BEFORE funding ends, and doing the applications etc. whilst writing up your thesis etc. is not easy.

Next thing to be aware of is whether you can secure a job or you can get your business started again etc. after your phd is completed. There are so many people with phds with no jobs. I am one of them.

Family (and partner) support is also helpful -- during a phd people can have very very good and "high" days, and some days the process gets frustrating and people go through difficult phases.

best of luck
love satchi

Mrs Joan Lloyd Smith or maybe she earned a PhD and didn't tell anybody..

More people will go into debt, not sure whether it's a wise to get a loan to do a phd when jobs are not guaranteed at the end plus it is not interest free. Also, £25,000 may not be enough.

love satchi

hi, here is an example of funding for non UK/EU applicants, maybe you can find something?
love satchi

hi BeenishW, welcome to the Forum.

Some PhD interviews can be held over Skype, it doesn't have to be face-to-face, also it depends on the sponsoring university, if they open their studentship applications to non-EU nationals, then it would be most likely that they do an online interview.

I think it is safe to say that most universities will consider academic record AND research proposals, but sometimes the research project is already planned, so again it depends. All universities will be interested in academic records.

Career prospects in the UK after PhD -- I think it depends what career it is, there is a huge need for dentists, doctors, nurses, people from overseas can apply, it depends on what area of specialism, area of study.

I can honestly say that the job market is very competitive, and will be even harder for non-EU nationals, not because of ability, qualifications etc., rather, the obstacles will be work experience and issues relating to visa.

As an example on visa, sometimes there are job advertisements, they say-- you have to show proof that you can work in this country -- so without that, how can one apply?

Nevertheless, there is a visa offered for phd people called the Doctorate Extension Scheme (DES), but there are conditions, you have to be near submission, and that gives you ONE YEAR to be employed so let's say you have this DES, and it will expire in 2 months, the tricky bit is how will you apply for a job when your DES will expire in 2 months, and also you need to find the right employer who will be able to sponsor a work visa etc.

Again, my telling you about DES could be old news, Home office revises rules and application forms regularly.

My own experience of job hunting is this -- in the UK, applicants usually need to have a certificate/qualification for every single thing to be able to meet the requirements to apply for a particular job. And then there is WORK experience, this is probably the most difficult part for me. If I can't get employed, how can I gain work experience, and it goes the other way round as well.

best of luck
love satchi

hi AOE26, I enjoyed my phd, loved every minute of it. At that time, the thought of being joblessness never occurred to me, I was totally unaware of the consequences of "what-would-happen-after-a-phd" I did not have anything to worry about, except write up, defend, finish the phd.

I had a fantastic supervisor and made many good friends in the university and met fantastic people in the Forum. Although people do remain anonymous, I appreciate the responses coming from real people and I can always come back here when I need to share something, or ask questions.

love satchi

hi everyone
I found our old thread today which started 3 years ago. I wonder where everyone is and how is everyone else doing?

I am right back where I started now, having to job-hunt again!

so far I have had four interviews since October 2015, two rejections and now possibly another one -- as the stated interview date is 28th and it is 23rd now I still haven't heard back from them.

still going on...
love satchi

true, posts written in a thread can be misread. At the end of the day, only you can decide if you want to do that "additional" research with the doctor.

best of luck
love satchi

hi Modammadb
Your supervisor is not going to run literature searches, collect data for you, or help you in the lab. PhD students doing all the work is very normal.

A student is expected to do ALL the research for a phd, the supervisor is there to show the way -- where to find papers, which are the best papers in the field etc. comment and discuss things. They already have their own work so they won't expect to do direct work for their phd student. You will be extremely lucky if you can find a supervisor who will do some (or divide) the phd work.

Please don't accept the PhD studentship if :
- you are not willing to do "all" the work
- if the stipend is not enough to support you
- the supervisor is not suitable in the area
- your gut feeling in the beginning is giving you alarm signals

best of luck
love satchi

hi captainslow,
I've just seen your thread, if this is something you would like to do, yes why not. Hope you get started, and wishing you all the best to "re-start" your engine.

big hug
love satchi

hi, the circles are usually numbered, so you have put 6 circles, it would be scored 1 2 3 4 5 6 and then your user chooses say, the nearest circle to ugly, that would be scored as 1. To find the mean, use descriptive statistics.

To find p-value, first determine what kind of test you want to use.

hope this helps
love satchi