Do you ever feel that anyone can do better?
There's lots of these threads but anyway I would be very happy to hear any supportive comments :) It would surely help my days & thank you in advance :)
Do you ever feel that anyone can do better than you in this particular research? I always do. Anybody can do better than me. I'm not saying that out of my fear & negative emotions alone. I also just started learning this particular field during my PhD, where the undergraduate students understand the basics more than me (I can't even do the exams right compared to the undergrads).
And I only have 1 year left, & so much theories need to be researched first before moving to the applications. My supervisor is always supportive but he also said why can't i work faster & the works actually can be done in 1 year. Any bright researchers out there can do faster & better than me, it's just they're working on other topics. I cant do on my own, very slow, with very little basics (I'm not lying), cant work hard, afraid of other students & academicians blablabla..
I feel I don't deserve the funding & job post that I'll need to do because of the scholarship bond. I feel like they can fire me at any time (they're very kind, that's why they didn't fire me yet). If I fail PhD or they fire me, I need to pay all the amount they paid for my studies, which is very high that my family & I cant afford. I know there's so much great researchers out there who deserve what I'm getting now. For most people it's a blessing (that I'm really lucky), for me it's more like a curse. Of course I also feel thankful & I want to turn this from a curse to a blessing.
Any kind supportive comments would be very appreciated..
The Imposter Syndrome, it can affect us all at times. Sure, the work could always be done better by someone else (e.g. an experienced academic, a Nobel Prize winner), but at the end of the day it will be YOUR work, that represents YOUR best effort. You will be the authority on the particular subject matter of your work—not someone who hasn’t done the PhD.
Oh yes, I get this a lot, and I've not even started my PhD yet! A good thing to do might be to think to yourself whenever you feel like anyone can do this, 'yes. but they're not'. You've got to this point for a reason - no admissions would allow you on to a PhD course if you weren't of a certain capability. Anytime you feel yourself berating yourself for not being good enough, try to remind yourself how far you've come. One thing I find useful is to speak to people who haven't been to university. Such people can be a real confidence booster (in my experience) as often without you even broaching the subject they will tell you how amazing it is that you're doing a PhD, and that you must be so clever. Sometimes one of the biggest mistakes I make is - and I think this is where a lot of my own lack of confidence issues derive from - that I place myself around very intelligent people and begin to compare myself to them. But, ultimately, comparing ourselves to other people isn't healthy, as much as it is human nature to do so.
Also, you mention that you've only just started learning in this field, so I feel you should give yourself a chance to become accustomed to it. Even some of the most intelligent people will take a while to come to terms with a new field. I wouldn't worry yourself about having not grasped the basics - after all, they are just that, and shouldn't be hard for you to pick up over time. Also, I doubt your university would want to fire you/fail you - apart from anything, at a crude level, they want to ensure that they have used their funding well and by firing you they would've essentially wasted that money. However, the fact that they are willing to fund you in the first place shows that they picked you over many other people. Try believing in yourself :).
Hi Barramack and BJS,
Thank you very much for your supportive comments, you've made me very happy!
I really love the part " it will be YOUR work, that represents YOUR best effort" and "anyone can do this, 'yes. but they're not". Yeah you two made me realize that it's MY work, which MY best effort; yeah anyone can do this but they're not doing it, I AM.
While waiting for the replies, in my fear I somehow managed to pushed myself to do some work.. and now reading your motivation comments I'm super happy & I'm going to move forward again tomorrow! Thanks so much! :D
Actually it is about need of the person. The more of research will be statistical, the more of results will be good.
Stop comparing yourself to others. "No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you." - said someone unknown.
Hi tejswini, do you mean more people will contribute to more result?
Hi Eds, that's nice, hope I can feel like you too.
Hi there, I am starting now my second year and I understand so well the imposter syndrome. I have a really big problem of comparing myself to others, but it's not only at a PhD level, it is also at a cultural and social level, which makes me quite depressed and 'inside my shelf' sometimes. Because I'm portuguese and most people from my work are english, there are many ocasions that I don't undestand what they are saying, particularly the jokes -and I'm also a veryyy distracted person. But I think that my distraction is in part because I'm always with negative thoughts, always with my inner voice that does not allow me to relaxx and pay attention to people.
Other big problem are my organisation skills that are terrible, I always feel that my work is a mess and that is never ready to show to anyone, not even my supervisor, which my the way is not very present,he is a very busy man, and we have to figure things out by ourselves. I have started making a plan of my PhD, making a list of things to do and cross what it's done. Hopefully it will help. But I would be very grateful if someone could advise me about organisation skills for data, time management and everyday life in the lab.
Hi there, I am starting now my second year and I understand so well the imposter syndrome.
Hi Diana, thank you for sharing your story and yes, it really helps. It makes me happy that as if you are writing in behalf of me - of course I believe you are way much more wonderful than me ;) I wish you happiness especially in your postgrad life :-D
I have had a similar experience. There are two of us in our research group who are doing a PhD - we are at the same stage. We share an office space. I have always had good grades, good practical and research experience, I have 3 publications already - I know I deserve to be here, but she is fantastic! She thinks of everything and is so meticulous. At the start everyone saw her as exceptional, but now her standard is what is expected. Sometimes I feel I am suffocating in her shadow. The constant comparison by myself and others has caused my self-confidence and self-esteem to take a nose dive. I've learned a lot from her and for that I am really grateful, I know I am also ahead of other PhD students, and I can see from other groups that the extra special treatment she gets is not typical for PhD students, but I have to deal with this for 2 more years. Anyone else experience this? How did it play out? How to shake the constant feeling of being inferior?
