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struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From tru:
PhD schools never find you a new supervisor. You find your own supervisor, So you can't even ask them to use the previous one who consented?

And what do you mean your former supervisor took it back? She can't be your supervisor unless you sign a form taking her back.

I still won't trust her with your reference letter. I have no idea what she will do behind your back.

On sueing, it is very rare that students win. But if you intend to sue, you better start talking to a lawyer so you can start collecting hard evidence before you graduate so you don miss anything.


In our university, there is no such thing as signing forms. My advisor formally communicated to the whole department and the PhD school that she no longer wants to be my supervisor. 2 days later, she communicated that she is willing to continue being my supervisor. So, for the phd school, all is ok.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From Tudor_Queen:
So what are your options now would you say?


I have no options, I have to keep struggling and work with my previous advisor. I'll sue the university for this right after I finish the PhD.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From Tudor_Queen:
OK. Will you be publishing papers from your thesis? You could offer the first supervisor co-authorship on any outputs from the thesis, and acknowledgement in the thesis. This would seem a fair suggestion given that she has been your supervisor all this time. But your day to day dealings would be with the new advisor. Could this work?


My dissertation papers are already under review and obviously she is co-author in those. This is another main reason why I need her reference letter, because all my projects are with her. If I get a new advisor, she won't write me a reference letter, that's her thing.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From tru:
Your uni can be unhappy about you asking another person to become your primary supervisor. However, you can say that your ex primary supervisor gave up her rights when she withdrew from your project.

And so it is your right to get a new primary supervisor. I do not think that the uni can actually block you from getting a new primary supervisor when your old one actually gave up her position willingly.

So go and get the new one on board. The withdrawal of your former supervisor has worked in your favour, even though it was such a horrid thing for her to do.


That's exactly what I wanted to do, but the Phd school refuses to find me a new one. I agree that she has only helped me by dropping me, but now that she took it back, it is easier for the PhD school to make me keep working with her, rather than find me a new advisor. So, I'm stuck with her as the PhD school refuses to assign me a new one.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From Tudor_Queen:
That is a good way of looking at it! I guess you need to ask yourself: do I have anything to lose here by asserting my rights?


I spoke to the PhD director, they refuse to change my supervisor, because no one else is available, and also because according to them, there is nothing "big" happening between my advisor and me. Hence, they minimize the way I'm feeling hurt and threatened. They say that she's willing to soften, and hence I should accept this and keep on working with her.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From Tudor_Queen:
Could you a) go to the old supervisor and ask her to continue to supervise (despite all that has happened), or b) as this potential cosupervisor if she would be your main supervisor for the final bit?


I agree that I could continue working with her, but this does not exclude the risk that she can do this again to me and still not write me letters of reference. Moreover, I have developed a state of anxiety every time the mail beeps because of her, which I really cannot handle.
Yes, I can have this new coadvisor be my new advisor, but the university is not happy to get reed of the first one because I have been working for 5 years with the first one, they simply undermine my issue as personal issues among two people, regardless of the fact that she is my advisor and she is using that power against me for issues totally unrelated to work

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From Tudor_Queen:
Is there any other academic who knows your work and could support you through this final bit?


Yes, there is a professor that offered to co-advised me, but she (my advisor) refused to have another prof as co-advisor as she takes it as an offense to her "professionality"!

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From pm133:
Yes, I have to be honest, at this point I would be recording emails and recording all conversations to build up evidence and then going for a full scale complaint to the highest authority at the university.

This is not a situation which calls for rigorous candour. I would be looking for someone's head to roll for this and I would ruthlessly pursue it. I don't see what alternative you have.


I have some recordings of our conversations where she threatens me and lies to me, but I think if I use them I'd be in trouble for having recorded the convo.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From tru:
Hi, classictea,

I really feel for you. You are in a very bad situation beyond your control.

Depending on which uni you are in, they may or may not let you change your supervisor so late in your candidature. Could you consult the postgraduate coordinator of your institute or graduate school for advice?

If they do not allow you to change supervisor, is it possible for you to write up what you can now and get out of there soon? Depending on how much data you have and how much you can mentally and emotionally endure, could you either write up as a master or a PhD? (may not be the best master or PhD thesis, but as long as you can pass, that is all you can do at the moment)

If you need further guidance, could you get an informal mentor who could have a look at your data and with whom you can discuss your work without fear of repercussions from your supervisor. This person needs to be very experienced and trustworthy. Does anyone come to mind?

I won't count on your supervisor for any reference even if she does agree in future. I worry backstabbing from her. Do you have a back up referee? Maybe a postdoc or lab manager? Doesn't have to be the same group.

Keep calm as best you can. Good luck.


Thank you so much, it is a great advice! My thesis is 98% done, I'm mostly worried about the reference letter that she won't write. SHe still refuses to write them, or at least she is unsure whether to. Another professor offered to act as a "mentor" and be in copy in all our communications so that she does not threaten me anymore, but my advisor refuses this solution. I'm left with no apparent solution and the phd director seems to undermine my issue.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Quote From Tudor_Queen:
Ps. This is absolutely unacceptable and despicable behaviour. So much so that I forgot to say it in the previous post.


You do need to be careful indeed, as she is in a position of power and has already shown she has no scruples about abusing that power (aka she has no character). However - please don't be too cautious and not do anything - simply because you fear she will not write you a reference. Given her previous behaviour, it would not surprise me if she screwed you over anyway - even if you do please all her wishes. She cannot be trusted at all. Is changing supervisors going to be an option at all?


Thank you very much. Well, some days ago my advisor decided to withdraw from being my advisor, because of a misunderstanding regarding research. I find myself without an advisor, only few months from the end of my phd. Although I spoke to the head of the phd program, I found no support at all. The director pushes me to go back and beg my advisor to take me back. I feel totally lost and without support.

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Sounds like she has already made your life hell.
What country is this you are talking about?[/quote]

Italy...:-(

struggling with my PhD advisor
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Hi All,
I'm new here but I read some previous posts and I wanted to share with you my concern.
I'm in my 4th year of PhD and I still have 1 year before defending my thesis (Jan 2019). I've been working with my advisor since 2013 when I started as a research assistant. I chose her over another Prof. as I really thought she was great, personally and professionally. She was indeed in the beginning. Ever since I chose her, she started asking me to help her on things outside the PhD, like make phonecalls and reservations on her behalf, babysit her child, book appointments at her hairdresser etc. I was happy to help her initially, as she doesn't speak the well language here, but then it turned out to be too much. At some point, she told me I was incapable to do things, because I failed to make an order as she wanted me to. At that point I said I was not going to be able to help her anymore. She threatened me to leave me as her PhD student and that she was going to talk to the PhD dean. She went around telling other Professors that I was a liar and not motivated to work. I could not do much as I left for my maternity leave some weeks later. She has continued asking me to work also during the maternity leave. Now that I'm back, she asks me to work on weekends (although it's sooo much struggle with a newborn), but she also seems to keep changing my thesis, telling me to change everything. She's thrown away more than 2 years of work telling me that "it's not convincing"...I really want to drop, but I've already invested 5 years into this. What do you suggest I do? I don't think the department will be able to change my supervisor, and if she learns that I complained, she will make my life a living hell. She has already threatened me that if I'm not nice to her, she won't write reference letters for my job market. Thanks in advance!!!!