a PhD mother


Hello everyone ,

It happens that I work as a lecturer at a university and I teach English as a Foreign Language and I have four children. Last year, I travelled and I finished my courses and successfully passed the qualifying exam . During doing my courses I have managed to write very nice five research papers ,of which I didn't publish any due to the lack of time and concentration as they all need some final touches to be publishable. Now I am preparing my PhD final research , the one which I should build my thesis upon, and I am suffering . I just can't manage to write one sentence . I feel like I have many ideas and I can't decide how to begin and what to include in my research . My words are all gone , the feeling that the words I am choosing will be always linked to my name is capturing and is restricting me from writing anything. Add to that the fact that I am back to my family and my time is not mine at all , especially with all the lock downs and online learning . Now I am teaching online , and my kids are being taught online. This lack of inspiration is surely what I don't need now. I feel that finishing this research and writing the whole thesis will be life-changing and it will complete the person I really am, but I am still handcuffed. It's like the idea of writing is overwhelming and I can't control it.
My supervisor is very far away and she's not specialised in my area of research and I couldn't change this. The other PhD students that I met last year are not very supportive and they don't have a lot to share. I can't find someone to think loudly with . And I tried all ways to organise my ideas and I just can't. Is there any way to deal with this blockage ? and is there anyway I can find someone who is willing to discuss ideas related to ELT and higher education?
Thanks in advance !


For writing, start with a small section. Make a list of the main points you want to include in that section and organise them into a coherent order. Then fill in the detail. Don't worry about getting every word right, it's a draft. You can go back and perfect the wording later. Then just keep going with the small sections. Eventually those small sections will grow into the full thesis. Or do some mind maps. Or even just write for 10 minutes as a start. Write down anything that comes to mind just to break through the blankness of the page and get you into a writing frame of mind. Hope this helps.