Hey everyone,

I'm doing one of these 1+3 PhDs, and am in the first year, doing lab rotations. I've just finished my first lab rotation and have moved on to the second, but am feeling really rubbish. I've been working really hard on the write-up for my first project, which I've now handed in, but I feel like I'm on a continual treadmill of work, and that if I take any time off to relax, I'll fall off and be unable to get back on. I'm not very good at all with new stuff and change, and I'm unsure of whether I'll be able to match the expectations of my new supervisors and the other people in my new lab, or whether I'll just be shown up as being incompetent and lazy. Added to this, I've got a really bad head cold (man flu :p) and so I don't feel too well physically, which is just making me feel even worse mentally.

I feel like I need a holiday, but apart from just under a week at Easter, I don't think we have any holiday time scheduled until the end of August, and feeling like I do now, I just want to curl up in a dark corner somewhere and hide :(

Sorry for the rant...

If you have a really bad head cold might you not be better to spend a couple of days away from the lab/work? It might help you recover better. Also prevents spreading the germs around ;-)

And don't think you can't afford to take a break. What you can't afford to do is to burn yourself out with constant pressure.

Could you maybe speak to your supervisor about this?

But do allow yourself time to recover from the bug.

oh dear 4matt! Firstly, I can tell you that the feeling of being shown up as incompetent is normal. I'm in my fourth year and still feel like one day soon, someone will say hey, are you supposed to be here? I think everyone goes through it and it will get easier to deal with.

Wow the other stuff sounds intense, but it sounds like there isnt much you can do about it. Make sure you take the whole weekend off to relax. Make sure you read books that don't relate to your subject, and try to socalise in the evenings too. Hopefully once your lab rotation has finished things will calm down a little, right?