Feels like landing into the wrong PhD and stuck trying to find a good solution

C

I'm sure similar posts have been going around, but I'm seriously having a problem with my PhD now. I'm considered a 'late' PhD student - I had undergrad medical degree, I've been working in a clinical practice for years.
I decided that I've cultivated enough interest during my training and I thought that I'd really like to go for a research degree to fulfil my career dreams. I have always enjoyed sciences when I was younger but I've been out of this field for quite some time. Now I've got myself stuck in the wet lab, for almost 2 years, project has been changed several times:
First time was because there was some problem with getting the good samples.
Second time, was I was trying to grow special line of cells which was inheriently difficult and unable to trouble shoot.
Now, I'm stuck with a series of experiments which are very hard to reproduce and gives me very variable results.
Not only my experiments seem unable to work, the added frustration of not picking up science as fast as my peers who are younger and have more work experience in wet lab, is constantly haunting me.
Over time, I'm starting to lose confidence in my work and I'm feeling I'm falling further behind.
Initially I felt if I continued to persevere, study hard, work hard, things will get better but is just not going well according to plan.
My PHD qualifying exam is coming up and I'm still stuck - I'm unable to get out of my downward spiral of negative thoughts of unable to generate good results and getting the best out of my PhD. I feel like I'm unable to meet the standards of purely trained scientists no matter how much I read. I'm always treated as 'not knowing enough' or not ''skilled enough' and it's a terrible feeling.
I don't want to quit but I don't know what I can do either. I'd really appreciate your advice. Thank you.

T

Hi,

I think this is a very common problem. I'm sure the other students feel they don't know enough either, but are better at hiding it.

Also, it's very common for experiments to progress slowly, even when you are just copying other methods. I took 6 months to master one simple protocol. This is normal.

Can you talk to your advisor about it?

I

Can you pin down exactly what it was about your method which made it hard to collect safe data? Methodological contributions are contributions.

Science is not just the results. Doing good science, especially for a PhD, is about starting a thread of investigation and developing a thread of questions based on the results presented. This can definitely involve refining a methodology, and doesn't just have to be about the outcome.

C

Try not to panic, easier said than done I know. I would recommend you speak to your supervisory team, or at least one of them and ask for help/advice. Things might not be as bad as you think.

Also, you can use your "failed" experiments to your advantage, for example, if you can argue why a certain methodology did not work, why the test you used isn't producing reliable data etc then you can show that you understand the science behind it. I'm sure you don't necessarily need a positive outcome to pass your PhD as long as you understand why it didn't work and can offer alternative methods for next time.

Good Luck

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