======= Date Modified 13 Dec 2010 17:59:25 =======
======= Date Modified 13 Dec 2010 17:52:46 =======
Dear all:

First of all, I apologize for the grammar error, English is my second language.

Anyway, I am a 25-year old Phd student. I am now working in a research and development institute. My job is a research assistant, but my role is totally different. My job is almost like an assistant of a director. I accompany the director to various big meetings such as UN Global forum, National Conferences, and WHO Regional Meetings in various countries. Yes, I enjoy attending those events. However, I feel different than others. The other research assistants (they are not yet Phd students, they are workers) are doing field works, analyze data, or write proposal. Sometimes, I feel like I am missing out something or will miss some opportunities. As they are learning alot about doing research. On other hand, I am spending all my time attending these meetings and writing meeting reports.

I have been working here for 4 months. I went to 2 countries and attend 6-8 regional conferences in development and 1 global conference. At the same time, no progresses on my dissertation and don't learn much about research.

Yes, my priority is to finish Phd as soon as possible, but I do not want to work as a researcher or professor. I think I want to be an international expert or a director of some organizations. Do you think my roles are good for me at the moment. Shall I tell my boss to allow me to do some work on research in stead of attending the big events?

Please advice. Sometimes, I am so confusing and even crying myself to bed. Please advice. I guess I am young and don't know what to do with my life. Please help me and many thanks.

Hello Jun480,

I don't think you should beat yourself up becuase of the way things are going for you. Indeed look at it as a plus. You are getting to attend conferences, and learn other subjects while you do your PhD. Along the same lines, you should talk to your supervisor to see if you could reduce the amount of time you work in this role to enable you focus some time on your own work.

The truth is the PhD is an independent work, and your Director may assume you have everything worked out. I am a full time student but also work 16 hours per week for an independent organisation. Furthermore, I demonstrate in undergraduate classes and participate in the school programmes. But I am also able to carry out my research and just concluded my first year. I haven't attended any conferences or seminars yet as I can't really afford them. So in one way, you are lucky.

Don;t get overwhelmed with anything - take a day out and try to break your thesis topic into key ideas. Make a plan and then at the first start, spend min. 3 hours per day researching those ideas, even if you need to work at night. You will soon see yourself into research within 4 weeks.

Good luck.