PhD proposal and topic worry

J

Hi everyone. First post and it's in desperation.
I am 9 weeks (including Christmas) into a new topic. My undergraduate topic was on the same general topic but a different angle and sub area was needed for PhD in order for it to be original. My MA thesis is unrelated. I chose the wrong topic for my MA. I am interested in the topic I am currently writing proposals (for funding) for.

I got a lot of reading plus a proposal written on this new topic in 10 days, which was crazy, but I was shortlisted for an interview so that was good (this was two weeks into the new topic) I blew the interview though. So now I am applying to another group offering funding. However, I still feel quite lost. Is it normal to feel like this 9 weeks into a new topic? I'm starting to have big self doubts.

I currently have two jobs meaning my time is quite limited but I am working as hard as I can but cannot shake the feeling that everyhting has been far too rushed. Is 9 weeks a short time or what do you think? I'm hoping you say it is! I feel lost and sometimes on the verge... I just feel I need more time. Have I jumped in the deep end too quickly?

I'd appreciate your views!

J

There are maybe a few questions you should ask yourself, and maybe some depends on the area . Writing a proposal in a short time is not that unusual, but do you have enough backgorund information about it? When I went for my interview - and bearing in mind I knew the people from before, and wasn't even going for funding, the first thing they asked is are you enthusiastic about the subject, and the second was, why? So do you have answers for those and can you justify them? they also asked quite a lot of questions around the subject, not necessarily directly connected, so have you read round enough?

This is the first step on quite a long road, so if you are feeling rushed at the moment, perhaps you need to take a step back and think why you are going so fast? Do you think someone else will think of the same topic? Have you had a flash of inspiration and can't wait to get going? Is the funding only going to be around for a short time, and the chance to undertake your research will never come again? Are you going for it now 'because it is there'?

You could, of course ask your potential supervisors what they think
:-)

J

Hi Joyce. Thank you *very* much for your reply. Much appreciated.
I have done a lot of reading but I still feel that to make sense of it all and come up with a strong description of my original contribution, and to write a really impressive proposal would take a bit more time (even just a few extra weeks). If everything had time to process then putting together a proposal wouldn't throw me into panic as it does now. I think there is more funding offered in May so I guess I'll have a better stab at that.
I'm moving fast for financial reasons. I need funding or else I'll have to get loans. I don't want to qualify in debt. I'll be working throughout the course of it but funding would cover fees allowing for income from work to cover living expenses. I want to get in, get this done in max. 3 years and get full-time work. It's all financial.
If I could get the funding it would also boost my confidence no end. I seem to be suffering a lack of confidence lately primarily due to feeling so rushed and therefore unsure, not grounded enough on the topic. If I could get over that hump and just get back to enjoying writing something that I think can change ways of thinking I could be happy again.
Cheers for the response. Still throwing a wobbler though ;-)

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