Starting my university life again

P

Hi, I am a fourth year student doing a MEng due to graduate this June. I have realised that I have missed out of university life so much, I have very few friends and I do not want to leave university. I want to get involved in university clubs and do a lot of socialising as I was never in halls in the first year and have been living on my own the whole time doing no socialising or clubs. Am I being realistic that I will be able to do this while doing a PHD? I really want to be a first year again but dont know if this is possible while doing a PHD. What do people think?

Thank you for your help.

P

Uhhm, I am unsure about what others will say, but your post, at least to me, appears a bit like time-machine stories! I am not sure what to say, it's like if a high school student realises suddenly that they've missed out on pre teen or even early teen hobby clubs, and wants to re do all of that in high school (which has its own joys and sets of clubs and equivalent stuff)..I am sure technically nobody's gonna stop you from joining Hall activities and other such undergrad-dominated stuff, but will you really like it?

I mean, at my uni, we PhDs avoid the undergrad haunts like crazy and hang out at our little pub..yes full of geeks but there's no geeky talk there LOL! Also, I hope you want to do a PhD for Phd-ish reasons and not cos you want to be at school for all the reasons you just said...


Well, I dont know what I am saying you could do, but definitely, you can technically join everything, but it's perhaps gonna feel and look a lil out of the usual, cos most such organized activities are usually pretty much undergrad and perhaps new post grads dominated....you will end up missing out on PhD peer activities, and then, when wil you make THAT up? PhD life demands other commitments, publishing, presenting, staying in touch with the latest research, seminars, hanging out with fellow researchers, research talk etc...

I guess you should do what this stage demands...be a doctoral student, and enjoy the trials and joys of the whole thing...its not bad. Trust me. :)

M

I've voted no! There is no way you can act like an undergraduate at PhD level, and the atmosphere is very different from undergraduate life (particularly the British undergrad life of partying). I've noticed many uni's registering PhD students 1/2 weeks after the start of term so they don't crossover with all the fresher shenanigans.

Although, if you manage your time correctly, there is no reason why you can't do all the society/club stuff, but this will be on a smaller scale and with a smaller group of people. Invariably it's very hard to make friends at PhD level because many are not interested in a social life, and others already have a solid network of friends.

Avatar for sneaks

No! Firstly you will feel soooo old if you hang out with the undergrads - it seems like a lifetime ago to me now and I have gone straightn through BSc, MSc and into PhD so relatively young.

PhD life is so different, in my case, there are no lectures (unless you are giving them) and far from being sociable is extremely lonely independent work! (luckily I have a few housemates doing the same - but we rarely 'socialise' and if we do its down to the 'old mans pub' for a game of trivial pursuit lol)

You are much more likely going to 'hang out' with post docs and staff after work - but I always treat this as networking i.e. try not to drink too much in case you gush something out about how you haven't done any work for a month in front of your supervisor! - nothing like the social clubs you are suggesting.

If you are looking to do a PhD cos of the reasons stated - stay well away! you would be better off doing a 'normal job' and joining clubs around work.

Avatar for sneaks

Can I just say, that the pure fact that I, a 2nd year PhD student aged 24, am answering this topic at 8.20 on a saturday night should demonstrate to you the kind of crazy social life I have 8-)

P

May I just say, Well said Sneaks, Well Said!!!

G

Never a truer word was spoken!!!

B

Maybe you can get away with it if you do a masters degree as you will have a class with peers, a timetable and something comparable to an undergraduate style of life. Or even start a degree from scratch if you REALLY want to be a first year again.

With a PhD you are on your own, even more isolated even from other PhD students who have to do their own thing. You will probably be spending the most time with your supervisor, (who can never ever truly be your friend).

Also think about whether you would really get on with people that are mainly still in their teens, away from home for the first time and discovering anew the things you have been doing for the last 4 years. I reckon it would be almost be like going back into kindergarten. Sure it would be nice to play in the sandpit for a while, but I think it will get stale quite fast.

For the record, everyone thinks everyone else is having FAR more fun than they are as an undergrad. Everyone else has better parties, is sleeping with more people, drinking more and have more outrageous adventures. Hell, I used to live with the most popular girl on campus and even she had a sneaking suspicion that she was being short changed n the fun stakes. If you get out of uni with a good degree, a few good memories and one or two close friends you will have probably fared as well as most.

S

Very unlikley. I think if you didn't get into this kind of stuff in your first-second yr undergrad it is even less likley that you will as a postgrad.

R

Just out of interest, can you not graduate and get a job and have a social life then? Why do you feel the need to stay in University to have fun? Sounds like a primary reason for you considering a PhD is that you dont want to join the big bad world for what ever reason.

All I can say is this is the worst possible reason for signing on for a PhD, just because you want to stay in Uni and have fun

when you join the big bad world there is an infinite number of clubs and socities to join and many ways to meet people new people and have fun. so you can do all of the things you have missed out on by graduating, getting a job and exploring the big bad world

on the basis of  what you said, I would say: Do not do a PhD.

hope this helps

J

I agree 100% with what RJB says !

DON'T do it!!

Avatar for sneaks

For some reason, a job as a recruitment consultant springs to mind lol - anyway don't do a PhD!!!

a lot of organisations have their own sports teams/ social clubs etc. try that instead.

S

I second what all of the others have said! I had to laugh a bit at the idea of socialising and doing 1st year under-grad stuff whilst doing a Phd - its not gonna happen. You are 'at uni' but not 'at uni' when you are doing a Phd - you aren't seen as a student by the under-grads, you are one of the grown-ups lol and ver dull and boring - if not actually teaching them in which case you are one of the staff and not a prime candidate for getting hammered with in the SU Bar. You can never be a first year again - that was a specific time in your life when you didn't know better (although you seem to have done) - you can't go back, either do a phd for the right reasons or move forward now and take the next step in your life.

P

Pie where r u? What did u decide?

P

Im not thinking first year like anymore. But i would like to be a member of a few sports clubs and have maybe one drunk night out on the town. And I am interested in doing a PHD not just because of staying at university. Im not sure yet what to do I will leave it a few months.

11078