posted about 2 months ago
Hi everyone,
Please be kind as I am new to this.
My boyfriend and I both recently graduated, having done undergrads and masters at the same university. Recently, he went back to the same uni we were both at to start a PhD, while I am making a way for myself in the corporate sphere.
I've been finding it difficult listening to him talk about it (perhaps in some way because I was also thinking about a PhD - I gained higher marks and rankings than him, although in a different subject, but I've mostly reasoned with myself that I miss uni life more than academia). I know this is wrong and patronising to say, but I feel like I am in the 'real world' and he is doing something I've already got experience of. I've also had more life experience than him - in terms of grafting my way up and serious bereavements. It doesn't help that both my parents were in academia for a while (one of them for their whole life), which makes it seem familiar to me. I am pushing my personal limits, working in a tough City environment - it's very strange to be pulled bacl to the same academic/uni-related issues that I feel I'm trying to move on from, every time we talk. As I say, I know this is wrong - I haven't done a PhD and therefore I don't know what's it like. But I just can't stop thinking like this, and I worry that it sounds resentful. I love him and apart from this one tiny problem, I am totally happy in the relationship. I would be grateful if anyone who has any experience of this could give me some advice.
Thank you all for your time.
