struggling

T

I am writing on this cos i am totally at my wits end. I am studying a masters course in design and I am really struggling to focus and get down to work. I love what I do but the pressure of it is making me practically useless and is meaning that i procrastinate and put off working cos i am intimidated by the magnitude of what I have to achieve. I feel like at this stage in my studies I should know what i want to do but I am now starting to question if I am in the right career path - and this scares me. Often i will find any excuse not to be working - tidying, taking time over chores, watching pointless tv. and this is meaning i am falling behind and becoming more scared.
My class is very competitive and it is expected that nobody has time to take time off of any description. My peers- particularly my flatmate - make me feel bad for time with my boyfriend/friends etc. - as i should be able to put these things on hold until my course finishes in the summer if it was important to me. I don't want a life in which is nothing but work but is this what a masters should be? and should i just accept that it shpould be constant work til the end?has anyone else found this and, more importantly, struggled with it??! the constantness of it is killing the enjoyment and i am scared that now i am going to let myself down by not producing my best work cos i cant get into and work all the time.
anyways, sorry for moaning, but it would be really helpful to hear any advice or from anyone in the same (leaking!) boat...

K

Hi Tired,

I didn't do a Master's but can hopefully give you some advice from doing my PhD. First of all, stop listening to your peers/flatmate. Time out is absolutely essential whan you're working so hard. My supervisor is the most efficent and productive person I know but he spends every weekend with his partner and baby son and won't answer a single e-mail. If you have nothing to fill your spare time then there is no urgency-why bother doing the work this morning when I've got all night too? It's about establishing a routine, never mind the emotional support you need from friends and family.
My advice to you, if you haven't done this already, is write yourself up some really in-depth but realistic plans for the remainder of your Master's. It might take you some time but it's so important that you know what needs done every day so you feel like you are getting through it. I write monthly plans for the coming 6 months, then I write weely plans in advance and daily plans every day. Make sure these are realistic- I can't stress that enough. There's no point in making plans if you've no hoping of achieveing them. Once you have a structured schedule you can clearly see when you'll have time to spend with your boyfriend and won't have to feel so guilty.
I say the same thing to everybody but mytommatoes.com is invaluable too. It's like an online egg-timer which goes off after every 25 minutes. You write down what you've done, have a 5 minute break and then get back to it. Set yourself a target of tomatoes every day; make it small to begin with if you're struggling to work. Then gradually increase until you're doing a solid few hours work every day.
Although I didn't do a Master's I've seen first hand how demanding they are, sometimes worse than a PhD. However, I truly believe it's possible to have some kind of a life outside, you just have to be ultra organized. You might not get as much time off as people working a 'normal' job, but you can achieve some sort of balance.
Hope I've helped and good luck.

N

Hi, I am also doing a full time MSc and its hard work - I absolutely love the subject and want to have a career in it, although that motivates me it doesn't distract from the fact that most of the time I am tearing my hair out due to the challenges it presents. I'm going through a really busy time at the moment with lots of deadlines (I should imagine you are too) and getting through it but sometimes I feel like I am at the bottom of a mountain. It is a very emotionally draining process, but I think that also shows that you care about your course.

I do feel like it should be constant work and to an extent I was quite prepared for it before starting the course, but you never really know until you do it. Most of the time I thrive on constant work although it does get a bit too much at times. I think the main problem is the timescale. A year is really not a long time to do everything in, and you are reminded about that from the beginning which makes it even more daunting.

Try not to compare yourself to others so much, believe me I know how difficult that is. I have to work part time to live, a friend on my course doesn't and I have to admit to feeling pangs of jealousy sometimes because she has more time than I do for the course. I have hardly any time to see friends anymore or have a relationship because of my course, job and horse; most of the time I am basically happy and I enjoy each of those things, but I do feel torn sometimes and then I feel guilty which is quite upsetting.

I hope that makes some sense and helps, take care, Nx

Avatar for Pjlu

Hi Tired85-

It is hard-and maintaining focus in the pressure of the Masters with its thesis plus other components-all squished into a year (or so if its part-time)-it gets tough. When I began I just loved every minute I spent away from work and other responsibilities on it-it was a joy. Not so much now though-so I think that sometimes you just have to face up to the fact that it is like work. Might have started out as a joy but once it becomes serious and you become serious-it is hard work.
We all procrastinate-take it from me (known at work as Ms Focus and Efficiency!!). My ethics approval came through-after a delay- I sent out recruitment letters for participants-have actually got some interested participants and I am just procrastinating-putting off the time I actually ring them to organise interviews and privacy and plain language statements. Have got everything organised but something is just making me procrastinate with this part...

So I think, as the other really helpful replies from respondents have suggested, it can just be par for the course. Some aspects of surviving this and completing just take either stamina or sheer 'cussed' determination and you wonder why you began-but don't let this glitch or lack of energy stop you. And never compare yourself to classmates, everyone 'amps' up what they are doing in competitive courses. Besides, what is it to your flatmate what you do? Why is it 'her' or 'his' business anyway. Sorry, this probably sounds not very helpful-don't mean it to be- just hang in there and use those strategies outlined in the posts- you will get over this.

Cheers

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