Just started, and unsure

J

I recently started my PhD in April.

I have always had an interest in doing a PhD, but equally in other types of work. However, I took up this opportunity because I was worried about unemployment. I was due to finish my Masters course this coming September but had already started applying for jobs and studentships in February. Being offered a studentship offered me financial security for 3 years and a way to ride out the recession. However, the downside involved signing up for a PhD which was slightly out of my comfort zone in terms of my existing knowledge, and also taking on something that was very technological with some theoretical basis in the social sciences and a supervisor who thinks along those lines. Although I have an unusually broad background, I feel frustrated if I can't assess the value or worth of things, from a philosophical perspective, instead focussing only on the utility of existing things.

Since April, I have been fairly upbeat despite my reservations because of the fact of obtaining a studentship and having employment. However, now I am starting to get cold feet. One problem is that I am not very interested in the theoretical perspectives I have to study. A lot of them are based on finding information, and I'm much more interested in weighing ideas and looking at motivations, rather than just how people forage around for information. I have found it hard to formulate research questions without feeling engaged by the study.

I am also rather bored. I find that my workload is not heavy and wonder what I am doing wrong. Although my project looks ambitious on paper, from day to day I feel like there is little to do. This feeling is made worse by my practical outlook: I feel that with a practical project, I should just do it, and see little added value of researching all these theories. The benefits in terms of the finished product seem minimal. I am discouraged to see how many people there are in academia, and question the real importance of a lot of research because so much seems like common sense, or alternatively based on fleeting theories that seem to lack intellectual rigour to me. I realised I had an ideal idea of standing in front of a class and inspiring students with new ideas, encouraging them to think critically, but research is nothing like that.

I am also tired of sitting at a desk with a computer all day. I enjoy "people work" and meeting people in the course of the day. I have considered getting more deeply involved in conferences but my supervisor discourages attendance at all but the most strictly relevant, and only if I present a poster. This frustrates me because I want to bring new, philosophical perspectives to my work, which will involve going to a wider range of courses, and transferring ideas across disciplines, but he seems not to understand this. I am surprised that there is so little communication across departments and universities, and that I can't make connections or find p

J

Sorry - I was cut off after going over the word limit! Basically, I concluded the problem by explaining that I need to continue with my PhD in order to support my family and also because for my future career (in academia or elsewhere), I need to show resilience. I just wondered: has anyone encountered similar problems? What kind of solutions would you suggest?

K

I get exactly how you feel. My phD is in the sciences but its an off-shot from my supervisors area and having started at the start of the year I've been frustrated with how little I have done. Things haven't gone a simply as my sup. thought it would and I get the impression he wants me to come up with all the answers when my project have such a thin connection to my degree :-(

Little tired of the 'you need to be the expert' line when its such an early stage in my work. I have days on days where all I can do with my time is read the literature :-s drives me a little crazy after an hour or so. And makes me feel guilty for not having more things to do given my stipend.

What I can say is that I'm going to learn to love this project by the time I've finished. I want to do this, and like you it keeps me off the dole for a few years (up) so that's a point for sticking it out. What I gather from the students around me is that everyone goes through something like this at some point. When it gets tough or you feel your getting nowhere, just keep in mind that at the end you'll have a large body of work, some published (maybe, not sure with SS) and you'll get the cool title of DOCTOR!!

Worth a few hard spells and days of boredom I think, especially when a lot of my friends (not students) are losing their jobs right now :(

M

Hi,

I do understand the feeling you guys are going through. It is pretty common at this early stage of your PhD program. Because of the radical difference there is between a PhD program and a Master program, the transition can be painful and confusing at first. There are a number of very important things you need to know at the start. When you choose a particular topic to work on in a PhD program, it is supposed to be like an unknown territory where even your advisor has little or no knowledge. Unlike the Master program, he doesn't know more than you do about this particular subject. Otherwise, it would not be worth being investigated. In order to gain knowledge and expertise in this subject, you must start by reading as much as possible about what is at present known about it. Reading a lot of appropriate literature is an essential part of a PhD program. If you hate reading, I am afraid the PhD is not for you. You are waisting your time. Think about how much more painful it is for the hundred of thousands of PhD students from other cultures who *read* (I should say decipher) the same litterature in English (the de facto language) in science. In addition, you should view the role of your professor as that of a guide not a guru who has all the answers to your questions and concerns. This program is a training ground for you to prove to yourself and to others that you are indeed capable in the end to carry out *independent research* on your own. After a year in this program, if you still feel bored and have no motivation, it is better to find other happy alternatives in life. I am sure you will find the right motivation to keep on doing your research by talking with people around you, particulary former PhD students. There is also a a great deal of resources, tools, advice and lessons for new PhD students on the "PhD Candidate" page of a Web site called Academic Joy.
I wish you success in your PhD adventure.

Maria Livingstone.

H

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way, but I think it is something most (all?) PhD students go through. Even those who are initially very enthusiastic about their topic and in their comfort-zone discipline-wise tend to have a fairly major drop in enthusiasm at some point in their first year. I have just finished my first year, and I have to say I'm really glad its over. My workload has increased massively over the last few months, but I also pleased that I now have things to do. I completely understand the feeling that you are just reading all the time, and don't actually have anything to do.

My suggestion would be to stick with it for at least 6 months and see if things are improving. Also, enjoy the fact that you have relatively little to practically do at the moment and spend more time thinking and engaging. One of my supervisors said I should be spending at least ast much time actively thinking as I was reading. There is a really important distinction there. I'm not saying slack off, but I don't think there is a need to be glued to your computer 9-5 for the first few months. Some of my better ideas and inspirations came when I was jogging or walking somewhere I liked. At this stage you want to be doing what is best to get your curiosity and interest going.

I would also say that while your supervisor's job is to give you advice on how to complete your PhD, it is your job to decide whether to act on their advice or not. If you feel that going to conferences, courses, etc. would help you, I would go for it.

J

======= Date Modified 17 May 2012 10:45:27 =======
Thank you for your replies!

I think I was having a bad day but I am glad I received such helpful replies!

Some things in particular have helped: first, I'm focusing on the fact that no job or PhD can make anyone *totally happy*! Anything is always going to involve some tough days or doing things which seem less interesting. It's just a case of rising to those challenges.

I found what Hildagarde and Maria said about it being fine to spend time reading very encouraging and while the project is still only on the horizon, I think its a good idea to use these initial months to build up a good understanding of an emerging area.

The comment about going for conferences that I think will help my research, even if my supervisor is not so convinced, was also encouraging, and I think I will look out for more opportunities. Getting used to PhD study also involves finding conferences where my research will be best received, and it is not always as obvious as a conference title which mirrors a major topic area.

Finally, I've been thinking that even though some limits are defined by the funding proposal, this remains a project in which I am free to decide which approaches best support it and which perspectives underpin it. It's a challenge worth going for!

S

Instead of going for conferences, you could try to engage more with your department and fellow PhDers and see what you can organise yourselves. Over the last couple of years me and a few other PhD students have really built a social community in our department and, on a more concrete level have organised an international conference and a seminar series. Focusing on such issues not only will stand your apart from the crowd come job time, but also mean that you don't waste time on conference papers that cover ideas that are at an early stage of their development and that you connect better with your department (which is probably the most important point).

22310