I left my PhD, but I still wish to pursue..was it a mistake leaving PhD ??

M

Hie. I was a phd student and I left PhD after 8 months. I failed in my coursework and was unable to cope up with the surroundings and loneliness in institute. So, under severe depression, I left my PhD. Back then I thought, PhD is not my cup of tea. so, i opted fr a corporate job. worked for 9 months again and while working in company realized, I can do a lot better than this stupid work! I want to do phd.So, now I have left my job and looking for PhD options as doing this simultaneously while I was working was not possible.Now, I really really really wanto do PhD and I am ready to fight any battle for it. but, My past deeds aer holding my mind back. Its eating me alive, Did I make a mistake by quitting PhD at first ?? Please help me,, I am in need of some words from you all..

T

It's possible to do another PhD, but you need to have grown from the reason you left last time. How do you know you will be able to do it next time?

D

Quote From mannuela28:
Hie. I was a phd student and I left PhD after 8 months. I failed in my coursework and was unable to cope up with the surroundings and loneliness in institute. So, under severe depression, I left my PhD. Back then I thought, PhD is not my cup of tea..


Well, the phd is not exactly a bucket of sunshine.... I haven't faced any major problems so far, but I did struggle with depression an stress at times, and the feeling of loneliness and isolation is more often than not. I spend 15 hours a day typing in front of a computer, it would be surprising if I was feeling splendid.

Hope you are prepare that feelings like that might crop up again....

C

Mannuela, have you looked for any support regarding your depression? I'm asking because you left the PhD, and it sounds like you have done the same thing with your job. It may be that you need to get some support in building up your resilience and coping skills, so that you don't become overwhelmed next time. From what I have read about PhDs, resilience is a major part of it, and being able to stick with it even when it isn't making you happy.

M

Thank you Dr.Jeckyll and chickpea for your words..
I have not really taken / taking any help.. but I am meditating.
It seems, my personal issues with my best friend-boy friend, who broke up with me during the severe depressing period, more likely reason for my resilience.
you sed it correctly, I was more overwhelmed and thus couldn't cope-up with the situation...
I am trying to be back on track. Meditating, exercising..and pushing away all negative thoughts...

M

Thank you Tree of life for your words too.
You are right. I need to thoroughly introspect before I jump in next time,
I need to strngthen my mind and willpower to get obscure fear from any such things.

A

I think what you felt when you were in your last programme is something a lot of us feel at various points. I started my PhD two months ago at the same institution I did both my undergraduate and master's degrees at. The experience couldn't have been more different - I felt lonely, isolated, somehow 'foreign' (like I did not fit) and entirely lost. To be honest, I still feel that way a good 40% of the time, but reminding myself of my goals and why I am there helps.

Overall, your personal happiness should come first. If you are unhappy with your research, think of ways to improve that - even small things help. Come here for advice - try not to read too many horror stories and instead read success stories. Be kind to yourself and try not to feel suffocated by the world of academia.

I hope you succeed in what you want to do! I very much sympathise!

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