Thank you both,

I don't really know why I posted other than to get the feelings out somehow, but it's lovely to hear voices of support. I suppose this has been my first real slap in the face from academia and I'm trying to square up for more....I don't know what else to say at the moment but will come back later.

Thank you again.

An article I submitted for a very minor journal has been rejected. I knew it would be- I had to seriously rush the thing, which wasn't my fault as I had so much else going on. There is a slim possibility of publishing in another, bigger, journal at the end of this month if I take on board feedback and make it better but I also have my mid-point review at the end of this month and my documents for that need a lot of work if I even want to pass.
I won't get an academic job at the end of the PhD, that's pretty much guaranteed. I'm very young, I come from an ex-poly university and I'm going to struggle to get any publications from the looks of things.
It is impossible to get everything done that is being asked of me unless I want to survive on 3 hours sleep for the next year and a half and I'm just not willing to do that anymore.
I thought I was a tough cookie but I seriously don't know if I'm cut out for this anymore.

Angel that's incredible! I feel bad complaining about my measly workload now! Hope you get some rest this weekend.

Not sure if you wear eyeliner but Bobbi Brown does a very good one which lasts all day and never smudges. It's about £13 for the pot but that lasts for months.

I like this thread, it's fascinating to see that although we are from such a variety of backgrounds we can still share advice.

Literature. Although my sup today described my thesis as interdisciplinary with philosophy...which it's not really. Philosophy-lite.

Angelofthenorth we are time twins *high five*. I'm also up and dressed, have to get into office by 8.30 to do photocopying and other riveting tasks. I feel and look like a walking corpse. Hope you have a good day (sprout)

Ugh, I'm here. Marking terrible essay after terrible plagiarised essay. I have a meeting at 9 am and this is the second time in 5 days I'll be getting less than 4 hours sleep.

Choo choo indeed.

Hi everyone,

Fig it seems like you have a clear idea of what you need to get done, which is half the battle in my experience. Last week:

1. Finish marking essays, add final comments and have moderation meeting (if it's meant to be this week- need to check) Will be done by the end of today.
2. Finish reading text, research and teach. DONE
3. Have worked out which sources I'm going to use for next 3 chapters and vague idea of what I'm going to do with them. Almost done.
4. Continue gathering ideas for journal article. Not done.
5. Work out how to claim expenses for conference trip. Not done.

Well, I did think I'd had a good week last week but apparently not! So much to do at the moment...must keep plodding on. This week:

1. Research, plan lesson, teach.
2. Complete and send off draft MPP documents to sup by Wed including outlines of possible chapters.
3. Have conference meeting, chase up lady who is supposed to be doing our website
4. Start working on journal article.

======= Date Modified 01 Mar 2010 10:50:32 =======
Hi Slizor,

It's certainly understandable that you feel that way. Lots of people have asked me how you can 'research' literature too, and I would say that you can't, according the general understanding of the word 'research'. There aren't a set of facts somewhere out there waiting for you to find them which would explain all of the effects a text might have on a reader. Having said that, some literary critics would disagree with that. For some people literature is just an expression of historical events,or the author's own personality, and so if you can find out new historical facts or facts about the author and their intention, then you will automatically understand literature better.
For other people, such as myself, the relationship between literature and history isn't that straightforward. Partly because you are dealing with written language, and language takes at least two people to form meaning - the person who writes and the person who receives it. And partly because the creative way that language is used creates effects which can disturb our normal understanding of the words that are used.
So whichever approach you decide to take to literature, that's your methodology, and in some cases this can be very clearly defined: for example a marxist or feminist reading of a text. But in most cases, the methodology itself needs to be interrogated constantly throughout your work. For example my methodology - my way of approaching medieval and early modern texts- is also the subject of my work. Alos, this does very much involve familiarizing yourself with other disciplines and methodologies. I use phenomenology in my work which is a branch of philosophy.

I hope this makes some sense...I could babble on about this forever!

Thanks everybody,

Eska your post made me laugh, especially the slow motion scene. I will think about that tomorrow and remind myself it could be a lot more difficult! I suppose the majority of us will come up against this at some point and there's probably people all over campus struggling with it as we speak. I'm not really worried anyone will laugh, the problem might be trying to get them to talk about it with me, but I think I just probably need to learn how to phrase questions so they're not so intimidating. I taught a poem a few weeks ago which had a sex scene but which was phrased in quite euphemistic terms, so I said 'ok, what do you think might be happening here?' and of course was met by a wall of blank faces!
I will try and be as 'factual and clinical' as I can. I was thinking I might practice reading it out tonight so I'm used to saying the words and make sure I don't stumble over anything. I'm annoyed at myself for even caring about this, especially as it's a feminist novel - I feel like a bit of a failure!

I was just wondering what peoples experiences have been with this.

Since I started teaching I've had to cover some pretty emotive stuff, books which use strong racist and sexist language for example. It's not particularly bothered me before but as we move into the last few weeks the texts I will be teaching are becoming more 'extreme' if you like. On Tuesday I will be discussing a text with some extremely graphic sexual content.
Now, the LAST thing I want to do is be all princessy about this and skirt around the issues. For a start that would completely go against the point of the novel. But annoyingly I do feel apprehensive about it and I'm sure I'll end up blushing at some point. I'm a 22 year old woman who's quite shy to begin with so discussing these things with a group of largely male 18/9 year olds isn't filling me with the joys of spring.
I'll get through it fine, I'm pretty sure of that but I was wondering if other people have experienced anything similiar.

======= Date Modified 28 Feb 2010 13:07:23 =======
Abso-bloody-lutely. I'm an early modernist but am dabbling with medieval literature, having no background in it, so I very much recognize the feeling of being an alien when you try something different. But then....we ARE just making it up in a way, aren't we? So is everybody else. Even if the author/film maker said 'this is what my film is about' that doesn't invalidate the different effect it might have on you when you watch it.

======= Date Modified 28 Feb 2010 08:25:41 =======
When I went for my studentship a guy waiting with me in the waiting room was wearing a suit and I automatically assumed he was a genius and that he'd get it. As it happens, I got it, but I was also wearing shirt and trousers (I'd wear a jacket in the future).

I struggled a lot with guilt a lot in my first year. Since then, I've become all about the lists. I give myself a set number of tasks to do every day (even if very small) and I try my best to get them done. Anything non-vital which I don't do can be added on to the next day. That way I feel like I'm slowly getting through everything that needs done and I'm not plagued with guilt when I go home at the end of the day.