Signup date: 23 Jun 2007 at 10:36pm
Last login: 25 Jan 2008 at 5:58pm
Post count: 635
"If you are not interested in the thread it's just enough not to open it. Your attitude is that of some old fashioned parishioner who watch other people's lives from the spy hole and then criticize."
I am interested in this thread but not going to appraise the horses**t some users cover as genuine advice.
"Everyone can express their opinion" Yes, including me.
"the fact that you are successful in your PhD does not entitle you to judge anyone" - PhD or not, I say what I think. You can't stop me either.
"If you cannot offer any constructive opinion you are better to focus on your dinner then! " That's actually a very good idea. Thanks Corinne for this constructive advice. Should I have Pasta or Pizza tonight?
"
"genuinely helpful advice" is what you seek? The truth is, you seek pads on your shoulder or people who share their "experiences". You don't want anybody to tell you the truth or give you genuine advice. You enjoy the attention you create with your story and that's it. You dont' want to get out of this situation, you rather relish the opportunity to talk about it. As others have said, grow up. This is ridiculous. Unfortunately you don't seem to understand how ridiculous your thread is and I feel embarassed to be part of this.
I find this whole thread ridiculous. Any intelligent advice could be summarised in one single sentence: "Lamp, you are in trouble - so get out of this situation"
All this bla bla bla about feelings, and similar situations and anything does not change the fact that the original poster is in deep trouble if she does not do something about it. So instead of asking for pads on your shoulder for being so brave and everything, I think you should ask yourself what you want more: a relationship with no future or a PhD
"applying for a PhD but simply don't know where to begin. "
First step: you write your name on an application form.
By the way, if you didn't enjoy your masters chance are you won't enjoy your PhD.
I think at this stage it is important to talk clearly and honestly: Do you really want to do a PhD?
think about it. Then come back.
"its easy to say stop these feelings now because you have to which I keep telling myself, but I just cant. "
Well, you got to make a decision. If you can't stop these feelings or change your supervisor (can you not perhaps work more closely with another advisor whilst still being officialy supervised by him?) than you simply won't get a PhD. That's the truth, if you like it or not.
what I mean is, right now the uncomfortable situation is the only problem. But in the future, the relationsship and chemistry between you and your supervisor could get considerably worse. It's like the swing of the pendulum. If you don't respond to your supervisors feeling love could turn into hatred or at least jeopardise your PhD completion.
The working relationsship between a supervisor and student can get very close, in particular in the final year. So much depends on this relationsship that your supervisor needs to be your supporter, your friend, your counsellor, your mentor and your boss. And this is not possible in your case. That's why I advocate a change of supervisor. If possible to someone with your gender.
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