as you know, I have an interview next week. I find it really difficult to not crumble into a giggly mess in interviews. I rehearse all the answers I think I'll need, and I do manage to say these, but I think my general demeanor comes across as 'young'.

I really want to stride in a confident woman, not go in as a girl who looks out of place.

Any tips on how to achieve this, without a major brain transplant?

Listen to the music you liked when you were a TEENAGER!!!!
it always works for me
love satchi

Before you go in, remember a time you felt great, a time when you were at your best - strong, smart and confident. Really try to picture yourself in that time and place, right down to the smallest details i.e. smell. This works for me. I sometimes get quite strange attacks of shyness and I just want to hide from people- far from charming. I focus on a particular time when, in my own opinion, my feelings and behaviour were everything I would want for and from myself. I imagine myself there, and that same wonderful person comes straight back.

Good luck :-)(up)

I would echo Bleebes points - there is a technique in NLP where you think of a time when you were confident etc with lots of detail, smell, noise, colour etc while squeezing your finger or pressing your nail into it to anchor these feelings - you then just repeat the action in the interview and those feelings will come back.

It has worked for me (a friend is training to be an NLP practitioner) and it was also done by Paul McKenna when he cured me of a phobia.

For nerves you can try rescue remedy which I find works too.

I've already taken some RR today and the interview's next week! Argh!

Trying to think of a time that meets the criteria! I almost always feel nervous/shy/like I've done something stupid!

I worry about the same sort of thing really. The young part not the wanting to stride in as a woman part! :D

I went straight from undergrad to post so I worry that I'll look a bit 'green' in comparison. But you just have to remind yourself that you've already got the interview. There was something about you and your skills that got them hooked. You're part way there!

To get over the nervousness I tend to do as little as possible that is interview related on the day itself. If I repeat and rehearse all the way up to the door then I get confuzzled and nervous. Where as if I just try and enjoy the day, think only lightly about the basics. In fact I go for the Saatchi reccomendation. Stick some music on if you can, something suitably uplifting.

In the actual interview itself to overcome the potential 'young' and 'overly eager' tags I make sure I give myself a little pause before answering. I don't just leap in. Stops me tripping up over my words and generally brings the pace of the interview down, so my answers don't feel rushed.

well I've just bought a new shirt and pair of black trousers to looks suitably 'apprentice-style smart'.

I think I'll just have to check myself with the giggling, I even do this in my meetings with sup and I need to curb it.

I think the pause before, and talking generally more slowly is a great idea. I can't decide whether to get my hair cut beforehand. Its just really long, so was going to just straighten it, sometimes I worry that it makes me too girly (i.e. its not a short 'business' haircut, although there is NO way hubby would want me to cut it shorter than my shoulders).

no no don't cut your hair!
the new outfit will do nicely
love satchi

Hi Sneaks,

perhaps you could consider the following: confidence = being content with whom you are.

As such the trick may be, in my opinion, to be yourself and to transport the message that are as you are and that you would be an asset for them (the employers), yet if they do not want you, that will be fine too, as you do not have to work for them. It really is a mental issue. Is it a fantastic job that you are going for or have you got some reservations? Especially if you do have reservations this may help you in saying to yourself: Are these employers good enough to have me? Do I really want this job? What do they need to offer for me to accept the job? These type of questions may then boost your confidence. Good Luck!

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double post

Thanks Rick. Unfortunately it is my dream job. Its in my local uni - where i did my undergrad, and its 10 mins away. Anywhere else would mean at least 2 hours travel per day, there and back :-( its also a really prestigious department and the salary is fantastic, plus its a tenured position.

But I will try and focus on the negatives too!

I think the key may be some breathing exercises and trying to be cool calm and confident, rather than rushed, red and ridiculous.

Oops, your dream job, well that is obviously great!!

mm, that would make my strategy a bit more difficult, although I think you should still believe in yourself.

Tactics could be:

Count 1,2,3 before you answer. Not giving the answer immediately gives you a bit more time to structure your answer and may come across as a wise reply.

Instead of laughing, giggling, keep your mouth closed and just smile. May come accross as sympatic yet clever.

Lower your voice a bit, comes accross as more mature.
:-)

Ooh yes, I've heard this many times- can make a person seem more in control, confident, assertive, all kinds of wonderful things (it's probably related to some kind of sexist subconscious notion we've all been socialised to have). Didn't Maggie Thatcher purposely lower her voice considerably to become PM? Important not to go too far with this suggestion though - only slightly. And practice first! There is real potential to look (well, sound) like an idiot! Apparently breathing so that your stomach region expands (as opposed to higher in your chest) is helpful in lowering your voice and helps to reduce nerves.

P.S. It's just occurred to me that I'm not sure what you mean by "lower"! Obviously I mean pitch rather than volume.

Yeah, if you lower your voice, don't go doing this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q38jS-auFv4

Hi Beebles, Walminski, Sneaks,

yeah, I meant try and lower the pitch of the voice a bit. Not the volume, I do not know what the volume of Sneaks's voice is. Although if one speaks very softly, this could be interpreted as the person being shy or wise, depending probably on other body language messages.

I thought the video was funny, and no, I did not have such change of voice in mind! I am fully aware that these things are easier said than done!

As mentioned, these are tactics. The ideal strategy for me would be to stay myself, however, I would think this is hard if I would apply for my dream job and I really wanted to make a good impression.

:-)