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a PhD mother

Hello everyone ,

It happens that I work as a lecturer at a university and I teach English as a Foreign Language and I have four children. Last year, I travelled and I finished my courses and successfully passed the qualifying exam . During doing my courses I have managed to write very nice five research papers ,of which I didn't publish any due to the lack of time and concentration as they all need some final touches to be publishable. Now I am preparing my PhD final research , the one which I should build my thesis upon, and I am suffering . I just can't manage to write one sentence . I feel like I have many ideas and I can't decide how to begin and what to include in my research . My words are all gone , the feeling that the words I am choosing will be always linked to my name is capturing and is restricting me from writing anything. Add to that the fact that I am back to my family and my time is not mine at all , especially with all the lock downs and online learning . Now I am teaching online , and my kids are being taught online. This lack of inspiration is surely what I don't need now. I feel that finishing this research and writing the whole thesis will be life-changing and it will complete the person I really am, but I am still handcuffed. It's like the idea of writing is overwhelming and I can't control it.
My supervisor is very far away and she's not specialised in my area of research and I couldn't change this. The other PhD students that I met last year are not very supportive and they don't have a lot to share. I can't find someone to think loudly with . And I tried all ways to organise my ideas and I just can't. Is there any way to deal with this blockage ? and is there anyway I can find someone who is willing to discuss ideas related to ELT and higher education?
Thanks in advance !