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how can this happen!?

P

how can this happen!?... how can this happen! to me... i feel devastated and gutted...um..i got to know the result of the telephonic interview which I had a couple of weeks back. Result nagative... i feel sad. I wonder, can this really happen, because I was in touch with my potential supervisor for than 8 months now. He said he is all okay with me and helped me with everything. My proposal, my interview and everything. I have read loads for this and I was the first one to apply this year. It was all fine and interview went on really well. I was all excitied and was ready to pack my bags and relocate.. but now..its a sad story... 8 months of hard work went in vain... its pain...:-(

I am gutted and get all wierd ideas, have completely lost my confidence. I have not many options now. I never felt so bad when I got rejections for other unis. This was my fav project.. and things were all fine.. but all of a sudden.... a blunder..

A

Were you given any feedback? If not, ask for some. It will put your mind at rest and may help with future applications. I can understand your disappointment but don't give up!!

E

sorry to hear that you didnt get it. I understand how disapointing it is. I agree with ann in that you must try to get feedback. Keep in touch with your supervisor and ask if they have any other projects that you could work on.
I hate to say it but that is how academia works....people are very nice to your face then stab you in the back.

T

That sucks. It happened to me a few times and it is really demoralising. Don't give up hope tho keep trying. It would be good to get feedback if you can so u can set your mind at rest (well a little anyway)

Being nice to your face then being stabbed in the back... sounds like the big brother house hehe

G

The above is all sound advice. I made the final 2 of a studentship last week. Got pipped by a young lady who had a 2.1 from the same Uni [She wasn't in the same league as me on qualy's by any stretch]. I was candidly told she was a 'known quantity' [which could mean a variety of things], which swayed the matter. I actually didn't like the place so wouldn't have gone, but resented getting the short end of the stick a little. Vanity I suppose. Such is life in the end.

P

its surprising how peoople change.. The supervisor (ooops.. now the ex-potential supervisor) who I was in touch use to reply to my mails immediately and there were loads of exchange of e-mails. but surprisingly now.. hes not replied to my mail that I sent a week ago asking for comments on my interview n all.. life is not easy going.. it is not as it looks as well...

i wonder how many here on this forum has been successful this year. I know about slyvester... how about u golfpro?

G

In this context I am rather ashamed to say I turned down a studentship. I didn't like them or the place, so for me it was the correct choice. I am veering towards doing a Phd in continetal Europe [France or Germany], just because at my time of life I quite fancy it for a whole variety of reasons.

S

As has been suggested, the feedback is what you really need right now. It's worth keeping a good relationship with ex-supervisor because he/she might come up with something for you later and also because your research area is likely to be a close-knit community where everyone knows everyone else.

With exam season in full swing it may be difficult to get a response at the moment. However, resend your earlier email but suggest that I would really like 5 minutes of your time to talk about it on the phone, I will call you next week.

At least they've been warned and so will have to respond.

In reply to your other thread, I made 6 applications, succeeded (thankfully) in the one I really wanted, got 4 no thank yous and I'm into the final round on the last one (I really should tell them that I've accepted somewhere else, but I can't resist seeing how far my application goes).

Best thing I can suggest is to use the feedback and keep on with your persistence and determination. Things have a knack of happening for the best, meaning that something good is waiting to come up. You'll get there!

M

big hug from me.
been there. know how you feel. i won't be surprised if they tell you, you were excellent and a strong candidate and everything was fine with your application. i believe it is about luck as well.

keep trying. this is the only thing to do. this year or next. if you bug them long enough, they must give you this opportunity. think of something else as well, i would give up a group which does such a thing...

i finished my master's and am a full time phd/job seeking desperate;)

good luck, we will make it one day

E

and when you've made it.... you'll wonder why you bothered!

P

thanks guys.. for all the emphathy... it has been great to be a part of this forum... i understand all the things u tell me.. I know failures a part of life..but failing after so much effort and hardwork is not what is expected! ...

I guess it is all part of life.. I was reading this amazing book about Indian Mythology and thier ethics and values n stuff.. There it says.. "Those who dont have the teeth have the salted almonds and those who have the teeth dont have the salted almonds".. I know it sounds really bad in english (literal language conversion) but it sounds good in Indian (My frnd read it out to me)..

so i guess Phd is more like salted almonds!!

S

You on drugs?

P

He he he .. not yet..

S

Kiera, usual rules apply here - hang in there and you'll get what you want eventually. Learn what you can, pick yourself up and fight for the next one.

P

Thats bad to hear Keira!.It hurts isnt it!! good thing is that girls can vent out the agony and discontent by crying out either with drinks or without .. but I think we guys are at disadvantage here... we just cry like girls

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