This doesn't need any answers, unless it's sympathy, as I'm aware I am wallowing in privileged self pity right now, but if I rant one more time to my partner about this I think she might make me sleep outside.
The wait for my Viva is crippling me. I submitted 2 months ago, I have no idea when my viva will be. I'm aware my internal is super busy (we work in the same department) so I can't really complain. I'm aware that with us all trying to learn how to teach in this new COVID world is going to take priority, I suspect my external is facing the same difficulties, so I can't complain. But my gosh it is crippling me. I check my emails so many times a day, I wake up at night with nightmares.
Given my tendencies to chronically over think things, here is a list of all the irrational nightmares I've had about this upcoming moment of doom, I share in the hopes that they make at least one person smile, or I find out I'm no the only person to have these random dreams.
1) I wake up and suddenly realise that my viva date went to my junk mail and my viva is in 20 minutes. In my panic I forget to put clothes on and turn my camera on to realise I am sitting stark naked in front of my examiners online
2) I go in with my thesis only to realise that my actual subject was Harry Potter, not smoking cessation, and I have to try and lie and relate my work to Harry Potter
3) I forget how to speak and somehow have learnt Russian and try to communicate via Russian (note, I do not speak Russian)
4) My dog turns out to be my external examiner and can speak (and is very critical)
5) I unwittingly have plagarised my entire thesis despite my work being the first of it's kind
6) My examiner is Voldemort (I need to not watch HP before bed, evidently)
7) I find out mid viva I was meant to send cheese to my examiners as a thank you, I fail due to this cheese error
8) I realise I sent my children's home-schooling work instead of my thesis, and then have to roll with it to not fail my Viva (I did check as soon as woke up after this dream, luckily I did not submit their work but my own)
9) My examiners ask me to walk a tight rope from my University building to prove I deserve the PhD
I hope I get a date soon because otherwise I may fall in to the pits of insanity, re-reading this list I feel I am partly there
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