i keep crying!

P

i am nearly finished my phd (in about 10 weeks - still so much work yo do) but i keep lacking in motivation and cry - a lot! (and eat lots of chocolate)
anybody else having similar problems?!
anybody got any solutions to help me get through the next few weeks?

C

Are you getting out at all? being stuck at home, no exercise and chocolate can make you more miserable.
I sometimes try to work solidly for long hours in the short term to make a lot of progress. You do need breaks, if you get really tired and get nowhere that can be really demoralising. Oh, getting up as if it were a job (I can struggle out of bed in the mornings, but I find it more productive) and setting targets for people to read and discuss it can help.
I can only sympathise, my date for submitting keeps moving further and further into the future and I still keep having to change sections, look things up, draw new diagrams and learn more. It does seem never-ending and not helped by people I know working in new jobs already, and being in the 4th year with no funding.

R

Hi,

is there a reason for crying? do you sleep OK? do you feel low?. There can be several reasons for your crying, sometimes it is an emotional problem. Could be that you are working too hard.
Assure that you have plenty of sleep and protected time for yourself and people with whom you can talk. May be also consider to see the GP

P

Thanks for the replies. I think it may be from working too hard. I am concerned that if i take a break away from my work that i will find it difficult to get back in to.
I did used to go to the gym but found it made me too sleepy (and i already sleep loads!) but maybe getting back into the gym to get out some of the emotional bits may be just what i need?!

P

Hi
I am going through a tough time at the moment, both about my pending PhD and physically but I make it to the gym every morning. It just gets me away from my situation and lets me clear my head. Even if I am tired afterwards, if I don't do it, I am a mess by lunchtime. Chin up, you are nearly there, I have 3 years of slog to face

U

i was the same in the last 6 months before the viva. couldnt sleep, stressed to the eyeballs, depressed, tired all the time.

however i finished 2 months ago and now have a credit card with Dr Joe Bloggs on it. it feels wonderful now and i am busy getting my life back in order.

my advice is that everyone goes through hell in their 3rd year, but time passes and you will finish and pass, and then life will be wonderful. stick with it, work hard and keep a social life going with people in the same situation - you can sob together !

P

You are perfectly normal. I submitted a couple of months ago and although I didn't cry TOO many times in the last 10 weeks of writing up, I sure as heck cried enough times in the 4 years leading up to them!

Remember, you are stronger and more resilient than you think you are. You will survive the next 10 weeks, you will submit and you will recover afterwards. You have years to get over the stress, the chocolate and the lack of exercise, so I wouldn't worry if the only thing keeping you going at the moment is chocolate and tears. Just set short-term goals (eg 'I will finish X by Friday'), reward yourself when you finish X and if a chocolate bar helps keep you happy, go right ahead and eat it. Good luck!

C

I now have a pot belly now from eating too many nice things over my very long writing up period
Keep posting if it helps, and we can reply.

K

There are so many peaks and troughs in a PhD and I definitely recognise these emotions during my troughs. I generally feel like that when I am completely and utterly emotionally exhausted. You are nearly there - as Piglet says just go for it withshort-term goals. Also think about how wonderful life after the PhD will be and post on here when you our support.

R

Hi Phder,

seems a good a idea to go the gym, or ever even better to play sports with others. This will make that you get physically tired as opposed to emotionally tired. Physical tiredness will often make that you sleep well and often helps to manage and cope with the stresses.

Remember you are nearly there! Good luck!

B

PhDer - I know how you are feeling ... I'm about 2 months off submitting to! You should be feeling happy because (everyone says) you are on the 'final lap', but it still feels a VERY long way off (and of course, the concerns are now setting in about 'is my work good enough/what if I fail?', but at the end of the day, I can only trust my supervisors word on that). The only way to rationalise all of this, is that others have been through this and this is part of the 'PhD process'.

Don't feel guilty about eating lots of chocolate, go out for walks (as others have suggested), and keep 'pushing through' this final phase (I suppose those waiting to get this stage think it's the 'easiest', but as we know, it's actually the complete opposite!).

Keep at it (I'm also saying that to myself)! I want to see messages by both of us in a couple of months, saying we've finally submitted!

P

If you can get some Basil essential oil in a burner, this is really good if you're a bit weepy and for balancing hormones. Also treat your self to an indian head massage - you may find that after, it actually makes you have a good old cry - this is quite common if the person receiving is feeling a bit low - but it's really good for a release of "emotional toxins".

sending you a big hug.

V

I was similar near the end of my degree. Go somewhere with little distructions like the library. I found that helped because I couldn't cry there and I couldn't do anything else but study (unless I left). You could see if it's possible to book a private room.

S

I've cried at the library...

B

I've cried in a library too! To be honest, it sounds as though you're really stressed. I would suggest taking a break -- and I mean a week or two completely off free of any guilt and self-castigation. If possible, go somewhere else entirely. I promise that on your return you will feel restored and ready to go that final mile. If I have learnt one thing during the PhD, it is that time off is the best favour you can do your work.

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