Hello. Well I suspect this is a very transparent attempt to have a go at me....whilst many of the details are inaccurate, there are enough elements in there for me to realise that you are trying to describe your perception of me, or else someone similar to me in terms of finishing one's PhD, having a supervisor who was difficult at times, obtaining a new job, having a medical diagnosis etc. The rest of the details are your perceptions and opinions of me, and are not facts, and do not necessarily agree with the perceptions of others. Indeed, my supervisor has had many complaints put in about her by staff and students, my viva was difficult but I did not leave it in tears despite being in tears of relief on receiving the verdict (the examiners were not out to get me, but were there to challenge, as should be the case with a PhD viva) and in fact I am a mature student and have plenty of life experience. Most of my PhD is already published and I am delighted about my new job, although naturally I am nervous about the move and missing my friends. Of course you will probably now post and say that if I recognised myself in your original post then that says something about how 'accurate it is'. It doesn't. Most of it is inaccurate, as I have said, but it is unlikely to be coincidence that you have decided to quote several factual occurrances that relate to what I have been posting about recently in terms of completion of PhD, viva, new job, medical diagnosis and attacks. Of course, if this post is about someone else then I would have much sympathy for them and their difficult experiences.

I agree, more so now than ever before I have been reaching out to others on this forum for support, because I am experiencing difficulties. However, my life revolves around helping and supporting others with mental health difficulties and other disabilities, and has done for nearly 15 years. I have been a member of this forum for a while, and have done my best to offer support to others, which I believe is reflected in the 5 stars I have earned. Yes, the whole world doesn't need to know about it- that is why I post on an anonymous forum. I try not to take these difficulties into my day to day life, and am a very productive and caring person, who works hard and has not had a day off work for over 5 years. If people do not want to read or respond to my posts, then that is their choice.

We have a history of disagreeing on this forum, and that is fine. I only respond to your comments if I feel that I can say something helpful. If you do not wish to read my posts or have nothing helpful to say then I am not sure why you take the time to reply. If you do not understand my situation and cannot empathise with anything I say then again, that is fine, but I do not see the need to be so unpleasant. I very much hope that you do not come across such difficulties in your life, and if you do that you have people around you who care and who will empathise.

Best, KB

Hey Eska!

I actually found my fiance on an online dating site that my friend signed me up to as a joke! My fiance was the third person I dated from the dating site. On my profile I put down that I was a researcher, and left out the PhD bit, although I 'came clean' with the people I actually met up with. To be honest, I'm not sure whether it's the 'female and doing PhD' bit or just the 'doing PhD' bit in general! Let's face it- especially for people who don't know a lot about the uni system there is a general stereotype that all PhD students are geeks. I totally love Big Bang Theory, but it doesn't really help our image! One of my dates didn't know what a PhD was but the other worked at the same uni as a member of staff, although he had not done a PhD himself. With the guy at the same uni, and with my fiance actually, there were a lot of the 'well, I could have done a PhD if I wanted to' sort of comments. Maybe they could have done, but it is interesting that they felt the need to make that clear to me!

Maybe it is a male/female thing, perhaps related to the rather out-of-date notion that men should be the main bread-winners etc, and the thought of going out with someone more qualified threatens that. Although I really don't care, it does bother my fiance a bit that in the new job I will be earning more than double what he does. He was really embarrassed at the estate agents just the other day when I said I'd be putting down the deposit and the rent money would be coming out of my account. But then again, I owuld have felt the same anyway if it was the other way round. Of course, I may be unemployed and struggling a year down the line anyway whilst he progresses- who knows!

Anyway, best of luck with the dating! I never thought I'd be an online dating success story, but there are a lot out there lol!
Best, KB

Hey GSM, I totally get your frustration. Being a PhD student can be tricky as a lot of organisations aren't sure whether you're officially 'student' or 'staff', which can get more complicated if you take on other university duties as well. I've just finished my PhD and even now things aren't straightforward. I'm moving away for a post-doc in a few weeks so have been looking at properties for rent (my fiance is coming with me). I've always found it quite easy with student accommodation because if you give them a deposit, basically the place is yours (at least where I live, anyway!). But now I'm not a student it's actually got tougher- there are so many checks you have to go through before you can even rent somewhere. Even though my new job is a post-doc, so quite a good wage (@30k), we were told that any applications for accommodation we made would be rejected because my fiance doesn't yet have a job lined up in the new location. So even though my wage is more than sufficient to pay for all of the rent several times over, we have had to pay 6 months rent upfront to prove that we can afford it. Luckily we have enough savings to do that, but if we didn't we'd be really struggling to secure a rental property at all. I think with the financial situation as it is at the moment, organisations are being very cautious about putting their trust in people as far as paying money goes. I'm sure it is worse for students, but I'm not sure it even ends there :( I can sort of understand why it's so hard, but it's very frustrating. Best, KB

Hey again! Just had a look online- if you google 'ESRC accredited masters' and click on the first link, it takes you to another link for a list of courses that the ESRC will accept as providing sufficient training in research to apply for PhD funding with them. It might not be relevant to your subject area, and of course you could get funding from elsewhere, but the ESRC do fund a lot of psychology projects so might be worthwhile considering. Best, KB

To elaborate- like Delta, my funding wasn't actually from a research council- I won a national scholarship that required an MSc but didn't specify what the MSc had to entail so long as it was considered to be 'appropriate training'. But I applied for funding from several places to start with and I remember one of the research councils did require that the MSc had a certain accreditation. I honestly can't remember the exact details but it was definitely to do with how large the research component was....it might not be relevant to you but it is something you could just check out. I'm sure the department you apply to would be able to give you any such details. Best, KB

Hey Twanky, thanks :) I'm not sure the kids de-stressed me, but they certainly take my mind off my own issues and put things into perspective a bit. And they're so funny, like a little comedy double-act! I do try to keep busy to keep me distracted, and do loads of exercise as that really helps, but I'm still feeling pretty awful. It's probably gonna be back to the docs for me this week, which is a shame as I've been doing really well, but that's life....this will come and go, like everything else! Meanwhile I've got plenty to keep me occupied with moving location, hopefully I'll be feeling better by the time I start the post-doc - I'm really looking forward to it and would love to carve out a future there so want to make sure I'm well enough to give it 100%. Thanks for your support :) KB

Hi Laurajane! You do need to be a little bit careful with your selection. If you do an MSc that is part-taught, then you need to make sure that the research component is large enough for it to be accredited for certain funding companies (where you might be applying for PhD funding). The ESRC, for example, will only count the masters as a masters if a certain proportion of it is research-based- or at least that was the case a few years back, it might have changed since then. My MSc was part-taught and part-research (with a 50:50 split), and that was fine, but it is worth checking accreditations out etc. The MRes should be fine in terms of applying for a PhD, but of course you do miss out on some taught modules that might be beneficial. Best, KB

======= Date Modified 04 Sep 2011 16:38:03 =======

Haha, I know I'm not the only one who is thinking what I'm thinking too.

Thanks everyone- finally got my new address sorted so I can start making firmer plans now. Just had a fab weekend looking after my two little nephews, which is certainly one excellent way to distract yourself from stressful events! Also just had another paper accepted which has cheered me up a little! Looking forward to the move now and starting the new job, can't wait to get there and get settled and then hopefully the anxiety will shift :)

Hope everyone else had a cool weekend too!
Best, KB

======= Date Modified 02 Sep 2011 14:05:20 =======
Thanks everyone for some really good advice. I suppose I haven't really given myself much of a break. My trip away right after my viva had to be cancelled because my other half was ill, and I was gutted. That break was what was keeping me going in the run up to my viva. We got as far as boarding the plane and then had to disembark because he really wasn't well enough to fly.

Since all that I've been preparing to move away for the new job. The house-hunt has been stressful, and of course I'm nervous about starting somwhere new and leaving all of my friends behind. It is difficult for me to get support at the moment. I am no longer eligible for student services, where I had been seeing a counsellor (who has just retired anyway) and a mental health advisor. Because my new address is not yet confirmed (application still processing), I can't set up any support yet in the new location.

The other issue that is stopping me asking my GP/consultant for help is that I will have to undergo an occupational health check to re-new my NHS research passport and research contract for my new job. It took me 6 visits to get through occupational health for my PhD because of my history of bipolar (they treat anyone with a history of mental health problems like a serial killer), and if there's any sign of current difficulties on my health records I may not get clearance for the new job. It's a risk I can't afford to take. I can't delay beginning the post either- my start date has been arranged so that I will overlap with the girl whose job I will be taking over for a few weeks, so that I get to grips with the role and am ready to take over when she leaves.

I think you're right though that the move is causing me stress, and that I need to try to take some time out before the new job. My body just hasn't unwound yet and I suspect that it might only do so when I am moved and settled in the new location. My boyf is moving with me, so I won't be on my own, and he is very patient and understanding as well. It is strange having it all done, but I am trying to keep myself very busy, as you suggest Skig. I go to the gym every day, have been catching up with people and generally doing things that I haven't had time to do for a few months. Being busy does help a lot- I know that from my own experiences!

Phdbug- sorry to hear you're feeling rotten as well. I wish you the very best of luck with your viva, and even though in my case I don't feel great, there is still a strong sense of relief when it is all over. Will be keeping an eye out on the big day to hear how you've done!

Best, KB

Hi! I believe that there is actually much less of an emphasis on institution for a PhD. Obviously, Manchester Uni is well-reknowned as being a very good institution for both taught course and research, but there are other issues to take into account if you are planning to do a PhD. Whilst the institution is arguably very important for undergrad and masters degrees, for your PhD you are more likely to be judged on the reputation of the particular department (which may differ significantly from the reputation of the uni as a whole), the reputation of your team and your supervisors, and of course your PhD topic and whether you manage to publish any of your work (very important in some subjects if you want to get a post-doc). Of course, all these things being equal, then being at a university with a good reputation would also be an advantage, but I think this is less salient at PhD level. Primarily, you need to find a department where there are researchers whose topics of interest match yours, and who would be willing to supervise you. Good luck with it, KB

Hello all!

This must sound completely ridiculous, but even 3 weeks after my viva and with corrections accepted, I still feel pretty rubbish. I was so stressed for the two months before submission and viva (you all know the story- deadline brought forward blah blah) but I assumed once it was over I'd feel great. Of course, I'm pleased and relieved etc, but I still feel so anxious, am being sick all the time, and just feel so out of sorts.

Today I've just had a massive panic attack in front of my other half, and I feel stupid. It happened a lot in the build up to submission/viva, but never in front of anyone, just when I was on my own. They just seem to happen out of nowhere and leave me shaking, hyperventilating and crying for no obvious reason at all. I'm moving away to start the new job in a few weeks, which I'm looking forward to (and am incredibly grateful that I have a job to go to), but this does mean I'll have no access to the medical support I've had set up for me over the years where I currently live. Obviously, I can set new support up, but it will take months. I'm scared I'll get there and fall to pieces in the new job.

I really don't mean to sound ungrateful that I've finished and got a job to go to, or appear insensitive, when I know loads of others on here are working towards that, and have far greater difficulties to deal with than this. Logically, I'm delighted. But emotionally, I'm just not feeling it at all. I feel awful, and I also feel awful that I feel awful (if you see what I mean) when I know I should be on top of the world. Any words of support/advice would be great.

Thanks. KB

Hey there! I've just completed my PhD in clinical psychology, but have friends across all different areas of psychology as well (and in different universities). Most psychology departments will expect a masters for entry onto a PhD- in our department, it is a formal requirement, even if you have a first class undergraduate degree. This is not true of all PhD subjects- straight sciences, for example, do not usually require a masters. But psychology PhDs are extremely competitive, so even if it wasn't a formal requirement, it's unlikely you would win funding for a PhD without one (unless you had a lot of previous experience). Of course, there may be exceptions to this rule, so if you have a specific university in mind, contact them and check! Also, a masters is a good way of getting a foot in the door at a particular department, and receiving support for an application for PhD funding, so if you can afford to do one financially then it's probably a good investment. Best, KB

Hey! Definitely go for it- you've absolutely nothing to lose. I was in a similar situation with the job I'm starting next month- went to the first interview and didn't get it, but got excellent feedback (beaten by someone with 2 doctorates, grrr!). Was then asked back for a second interview for another very similar job that had just come up in the same team and was offered it in the interview. If you've already made a good impression in the first interview (and not getting it doesn't mean you made a bad impression) then going back for another one will just confirm to them that you are really interested in the position and very keen to work in their team. Good luck with it :) KB

Hi Ruth! You have my sympathy- I can really relate to your post. My supervisor, although she has some strong points, can also be extremely difficult and previous PhD students have complained about her behaviour. She is also well known throughout the whole department as being very rude, nasty, and arrogant at times. Whilst I actually had a reasonable relationship with her for the first 2 years of my PhD, over the last year things have deteriorated to the point where I have now taken a position at a different university to get away from her. Fortunately I have finished my PhD. I also suffer from severe depression at times (bipolar disorder) and have been hospitalised many times, and her behaviour over the last few months has really affected me quite negatively in this regard.

In terms of the university dealing with your ill health- I have found my department to be extremely supportive throughout periods of illness. In terms of complaining about your supervisor, however, this could be very tricky. The two PhD students in the same team as me who complained did not finish their PhDs. One was thrown out and one left, and their complaints were just brushed under the carpet, even though loads of people know what a nasty piece of work she can be. At the end of the day she gets grants in and churns publications out, and presumably for this reason alone she is pretty much untouchable. I decided not to put in a formal complaint about her, mainly because I'm too worried about needing references etc in the future, but also because I know it wouldn't get me anywhere anyway. Perhaps that's a wimps way out.

Is there anyone you can approach informally to talk about this? Perhaps your PhD chairperson? Do you have a second supervisor who you could rely on and have less contact with your first sup? I think a formal complaint could damage your relationship further, probably to the point that it becomes irreparable. Of course the uni should take it seriously, but in my experience, they don't always do that. At the same time, you've still got two more years to get through, and if it's causing you serious distress and ill-heath then it's just not worth it. If my relationship with my sup had been as bad as it is now at the beginning, I'm not sure I would have seen my PhD through. I think the best option might be to explore alternative supervision arrangements, but it's a very tricky situation. Would this be possible?

Best, KB

Hey again Mlis. You know, I'm actually not sure what other advice I can offer, because it sure sounds like you're doing everything you can in a very difficult situation. All I do want to say is that things do change and you have to keep that hope going, because you will get through. I won't bore you with my complete medical history, but to try to summarise: After gaining straight A*s at GCSE and As at A-level, I went to a top uni in the UK. One year later I was diagnosed with bipolar, sectioned and spent the next 4-5 years in and out of mental hospitals, often sectioned for my own safety, totally drugged up and receiving electro-convulsive therapy basically to keep me alive. I was told that I should move to permanent psychiatric care and should lose all hope of ever going back to uni. I eventually did go back to uni but had to drop out another 2 times due to re-hospitialisation. By this time my friends were qualified doctors, lawyers etc, and I had lost my place at uni, my job, my drivers licence, and many of my friends, and as far as I was concerned, my future. Six years on and I have my PhD, a number of publications, a fiance, and a post-doc that I start next month (in bipolar disorder). Part of that was down to new medication that has kept me well, and amazing friends and family, but it took a long long time and a lot of hard work to get back on my feet. But things do change, instead of everything going wrong things slowly started to go right, I started to be lucky instead of unlucky. You really never know what's around the corner, so please stay positive and don't lose hope. You sound so unhappy and I really hope that things get better very quickly for you. Best, KB