Signup date: 11 Sep 2007 at 1:05pm
Last login: 02 Oct 2008 at 7:23am
Post count: 84
Totally with you on that one Yikes. I too am reaching the end of my first year and it has been so up and down that I am really beginning to question whether I should be doing my PhD at all. I think I've had ONE good month of research - well I thought it was good until it came to writing up my findings and thought, 'I've completely forgotten the meaning behind the material I've collected!' My annual assessment is in November and I'm going to have to really think about whether this is right for me over the next couple of weeks. I think it's probably best to quit in the first year - am I right?? Anyway, whatever you decide to do - best of luck and I admire you for your honesty - not always an easy thing when doing a PhD (being honest with yourself).
Zingo, I am so sorry to hear you are going through such a tough time. As Angie81 points out - look after yourself first. Forget your PhD for now, and the funding side of things because your health is of utmost importance at this time. During my undergrad and masters I suffered with the same, and I use the word suffered because it feels like you're so alone - but you're not - and I think you're amazing to have got this far and coped like you have.
Jouri, you cannot claim that this thread should not be allowed on the forum - surely we are here as a support network, and trust me, whilst I'm sure Zingo knows professional help is necessary, it always helps to know there are people out there listening. PhDs are not easy and this forum helps people with wide range of concerns.
Hi, I'm definitely a holist - think my supervisor would prefer me to be a bit more of a serialist!
Thank you so much everyone for your thoughts and comments - really nice to know you're out there and to have support! I think you're right - it's definitely the isolation which is the worst aspect for me. I think you have to be incredibly confident in your ability to do your PhD, if you are going to spend countless hours alone. Whilst I know I probably can do it, it doesn't come naturally to me. I have ideas but when it comes to writing them down - they come out in a jumbled mess! And the more hours I spend alone, the more I doubt my own abilites. It's a vicious circle really. I'd agree, I should imagine that this is very much the case for novelists. I just worry that if I continue to feel this down about my work - it'll have detrimental effects on my health, self-esteem and maybe even my relationship with my partner?? It's very hard to know what's right, and I'd hate to run the risk of having given up such a great opportunity.
I've posted on here before about the emotional rollercoaster journey that is a PhD, but I'm now concerned that perhaps the extent to which I feel this is not healthy. I'm eight months in and passed registration, and just written up my first draft of intro. But because I don't get much feedback from supervisor, and because I work alone (English Lit research), I find motivation hard and I've begun to question, 'why am I doing this?' If I quit, I run the risk of realising I actually did really want to do it, but I'm not sure how to figure this out. Does anyone else feel the same?
Well said AcademicMum!
Lara - that's a very good idea - contacting a welfare advisor and/or counsellor. Do you know if they are required to inform my supervisor? I presume it'd be anonymous?
I agree with you Olivia. My university doesn't have any sort of post-grad support network (that I'm aware of), and I think it's the endless hours on my own that is leading to this feeling. I am in the humanities so I'm either in the British Library - alone - or at home, again alone. It means that I'm constantly left with my own thoughts, self-doubts and worries. I don't think it's very healthy in terms of how it can lead to depression etc. I'm susceptible to feeling like this anyway (I've had a couple of bad episodes during my time at uni). As you say Olivia, it shouldn't be necessary.
Saying that, your words of support today - thanks all - have spurred me onto reach half way point of this particular piece of work!
Thank you everyone - it's really nice to know that this it's ok to feel like this. I guess it's about taking it one day at a time.
Hi everyone, I'm six months into my PhD and whilst I was fine for the first few months, I have a deadline in two weeks time and I'm suddenly feeling the pressure. I know that it's really not very far into my PhD at all, but I already feel that it's eating away at my self-esteem and that I am much more emotional about things because of it. Is this normal? Do PhD students, in general, find that they're on a daily emotional rollercoater? Sometimes, but not very often, I think, 'hey, I really can do this.' Other times, most of the time, I think, 'I can't do this and shouldn't be here.' Just wondering if I'm alone because I feel a bit miserable at the moment.
Thank you everyone for such brilliant advice! Lara, I really like your method and I think timing myself reading papers will be very helpful - it means I won't procrastinate nor will I have time to think 'I can't do this'. Thank you so much!
Will definitely let you know how I get on. I don't feel so alone now so a BIG thank you! :)
hi jojo, I wouldn't ordinarily start with the intro. but my supervisor and I have decided that in terms of this project it actually makes sense - and I can change it later if necessary. But would def. prefer to be writing up another section! :)
golfpro - I think you hit the nail on the head. Definitely feel like I should be writing something perfect, or near enough, but it's mainly because I'm feeling like a PhD fraud at the mo. I want my supervisor to read it and feel like he's not wasting his time! I'm going with the mental flow but maybe I should write up a plan. I've only written 500 words!
Hi everyone, I'm starting to write up this week. I need to hand in my introduction by the end of June. Whilst I've started, I feel like I'm writing very poorly and can't quite put ideas down logically and coherently. Does anyone have any tips on writing up and in particular, not waffling (which I am particularly good at!!!) :-) I feel incredibly daunted by the task ahead because I can't break it down into chunks, and therefore, I'm sitting here doubting myself instead of just getting on with it.
Thanks!
I'd say don't answer if it bothers you that much.
Great advice everyone! Thanks! Will definitely practice in front of a group and the mirror option made me giggle but I have done it before!
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